Break and Then Fall
by suspensegirl
Summary: Spoiler: UK S3 Finale Promo - Chuck sleeps with Jenny after Blair fails to show at the ESB. Now that B's come back, do they stand a chance? Can she ever forgive him for what he's done after everything that's happened? CB, hinted CJ, DB
1. For Better or For Worse

A/N: This fic is unavoidable. I saw the UK promo for the season 3 finale yesterday and just about fell into a million pieces. I was contemplating CJ as a possible drama on the show, but it certainly was different seeing it onscreen. *shudders* My word. Even in my fic 'Flashback', I wasn't planning on putting this in as part of CB's past. *shudders* So yes, I'm writing this. Don't read on if you don't wanna know about the UK promo, because I'm going directly off of that. Anyways, this fic should be short, 5 chapters or less, I'm guessing. I just need to get it out of my system, so I can actually write and vid normal CB again.

Please review. =)

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**Ch.1—For Better or For Worse**

He looked over at the petite blonde sleeping next to him and his breath caught in his throat. He didn't want to touch her, didn't want to be near her, felt so guilty, but so at ease too. If he had a choice between being alone for the rest of his life for what'd he done – being reminded every day that Blair no longer loved him and never would again – or sharing it with someone who was just as broken as he was, he would probably have chosen the latter.

He couldn't tell right now if sleeping with Jenny Humphrey had been a mistake. She had been a virgin. Her initial screams when he'd entered her had pierced his ears and made him want to die, almost as badly as the screams of Blair entering his nightmares time and time again. Jenny had recovered though, and passed out nearly the minute it had ended. Relief had swept through him at the hope of actually having somebody.

_"You deserve to be alone."_

Nate's words had choked him senseless since they had been spoken, but it wasn't until he actually saw Blair having a legitimate date with someone else and enjoying herself, that he'd officially broken. He put out the offer up to meet at the Empire State Building hoping he was wrong – that she really wasn't over him already, but when she didn't show, he knew he was right, and then Jenny was just…there.

_"She needed someone and I was there!"_

He shuddered at the resemblance between the two situations. They had both needed each other last night, he and Jenny, but he knew from this moment on it would be no easy journey. He wasn't in love with her, and he wasn't planning on going in that direction, but it _had_ been _such a_ _relief_ to _be_ with someone who could relate with him and wasn't going to hate him forever, because she was hated by everyone too.

For a moment, he remembered being happy with Blair. The whole year before was a living nightmare. He had caused her so much pain, and been caused so much pain himself, but it was nothing in comparison to the hell he was living in now. His eyes began to water. Just once more. All he wanted to do was have Blair with him one more time, looking at him like she was madly in love with him and she never wouldn't be. He sucked in a breath at the thought and found that his broken heart was bleeding again. He couldn't stay in the same room with Jenny Humphrey, not for awhile at least. He would attend to her when she got up.

He uncovered himself and placed the silk robe around his form, knotting the sash loosely. He grabbed a white button-up shirt from his closet and placed it on the small table beside the bed, where Jenny could easily get to it. He felt incredibly uneasy when he walked over to where she lay to set down the shirt. His stomach was churning and a sickening guilt threatened to consume him whole. _He hadn't cheated on her._ He _hadn't_. But it felt like he had. He felt worse than he did when the realization of her original break-up finally hit him.

_Somehow this was worse. Somehow this was so much worse._

He hadn't made it halfway across his bedroom when a small voice interrupted his thoughts from outside the door. His eyes widened in a slight panic. If it was Nate, he was going to get a beat down. If it was Dan, he would surely be killed. He'd be accused of raping the young blonde, he was sure. He wasn't even going to deny it if that was the case. Of course his resigning would look extremely suspicious, but there was nothing really left of himself to give. It was only in business that he might prosper. For one night he hadn't been tortured by visions of Blair gone from his life entirely. He hadn't been at peace, but somehow it was _better_. There was some relief.

"Chuck?" the voice called out again, this time a little louder. He could audibly hear the individual moving about the room outside his bedroom door.

Something fell into the pit of his stomach that felt like icy fire and a heavy block of metal. He felt hot and cold and he panicked. He didn't know how he was going to go out there and face Blair. He couldn't handle for final shpeel on how they weren't meant to be and that this was the final cut-off for them. Feeling and seeing it was one thing, but her words would haunt him forever. It wouldn't send him back into Jenny's arms, but most likely off a cliff.

_"Whatever you have to do to yourself, please don't do that to me."_

He hadn't promised her anything that night at Victrola. But now that she didn't love him anymore, it wouldn't matter. If he killed himself, she would get over it. Just like she got over everything else. She got over Nate cheating on her, her father moving overseas with his gay lover, losing Yale, himself breaking her heart with the deal he'd made with Jack. This time would be no different.

He took one last look at Jenny snuggled up under his covers, and opened the door leading to the hallway, closing it behind him. Then he walked out to where the call came from. He would let her have the upper hand one last time. He wasn't even going to try to get it back.

"Blair?" he asked, his voice small. She turned around and faced him, walked towards him with _his_ bouquet of pink peonies in her hands. His eyes zoomed in on them and somehow the sick feeling in his stomach got worse. _She'd gone_. He'd come back to The Empire after a long day of waiting, and now certain that he'd be alone forever. A one night stand with Jenny Humphrey seemed the only solution at the time; it would benefit both of them in their misery. But Blair _hadn't_ abandoned him. She'd _wanted_ to try again. They'd just…_missed _each other.

"Chuck," she said, registering him. His eyes flickered to hers.

"Blair," he said again, his mind completely blank as to what he should say. _Would she accuse him of not being at their designated destination? _Suddenly that was a very real possibility. Suddenly the flowers in her hands made the probability of her coming to break it off officially for them _forever_ considerably less.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, finding himself unable to move. She blinked and looked down at his flowers briefly.

"I couldn't make it yesterday. Dorota went into labor."

His lips parted. He was horrified with this retched turn of events.

"I was hoping your offer was still on the table?" she asked tentatively.

She was looking at him longingly, hopefully, just like he'd wanted her to. He never thought he'd see the day of Blair Waldorf actually wanting him again, actually wanting them again. Of course his offer was still on the table. He almost jumped in his excitement until he remembered Jenny Humphrey was still asleep in his bedroom. A huge lump formed in his throat. He'd acted too fast, based too much of his utter despair on what he did after leaving the Empire State building. If Blair found out what he'd done, he really _would_ lose her forever.

"You didn't call," he said, as if the situation could somehow be blamed on her. She sighed uneasily.

"Yes, I know. I'm sorry. I didn't. I should have. I just," she bit her bottom lip in what looked like guilt. How could she possibly guilty? He thought. "Dorota was…in labor, and I was just caught up in it all, and—"

"Confused?" he asked. He had to know. _Was she having doubts?_ Was that the _real_ reason she didn't come? He might feel less guilty and like he wanted to slice his head off if that was the case.

"No!" she said immediately. He was a little taken aback. She sighed, easing back into a more controlled behavior. "I knew from the moment you offered to meet me that I was going to come to you." He swallowed hard as she took a step towards him. "Because you were right. I _was_ just scared and I'm never going to be safe, and if I'm going to survive this life with anybody, it's going to be you."

He stared at her, his eyes searching.

"I love you, Chuck."

He started to sweat. Her words were unbearable, and now he wanted his own execution, right there. But he wouldn't think of it further, because now everything suddenly was so clear. She still loved him, and it would torture her and maybe leave her sad indefinitely if he set out to kill himself. The one permanent solution to possible relief was ripped from him in a heartbeat.

"H-How's Dorota?" he managed to ask, temporarily looking away. She blinked, confused and maybe a little angry at his response, but she responded nonetheless.

"She's fine," she said, "It's a girl. Elizabeth Blair." She smirked slightly, slipping out of the tense situation, if only for a little while. "I told her the name was too American, but she would have none of it. Goodness knows where she got the name 'Elizabeth' from. She chuckled. Chuck seemed unaffected and she walked towards him, inches away from grasping his hands. He felt like he was going to explode.

"Chuck…please…" she pleaded, looking deep into his eyes. When he finally registered her eye contact, he felt like he was going to burn merely from her stare. Her dark brown eyes were toxic to him, so much more beautiful and scintillating than what he thought Jenny's pale blue ones had been. At the moment, he couldn't specifically remember what her eye color had actually been.

"I forgive you," she said, inhaling sharp and exhaling slowly. "And…I'm willing to try for us again." He could have sworn he saw her eyes watering. It felt like a knife had been plunged into his gut and was turning at an excruciatingly slow pace. "I _need_ for us to try again," she exhaled shakily. "Please," she whispered under her breath.

He didn't know how to act or what to say. He didn't think he could take her screaming and yelling at him again. Her words would surely kill him in his sleep. Her high pitched scream would send him over the edge until he 'accidentally' strangled himself in his sleep. And though it would kill him to watch her walk away amidst tears and heartbreak, it would be better off for her. He just wanted to get Jenny Humphrey out of his _damn_ suite. He wanted to forget last night had ever happened. _God, why hadn't he just stayed longer?!_

When he said nothing, she took his silence as a definitive _no_. A _you're too late_. A _have a nice life Blair, I've closed my heart to you forever_. After all, there was no _unless you have a really good excuse_ clause to his last proposal. She swallowed hard and nodded.

"Okay, Chuck." She averted her eyes from his and blinked back the tears. She felt so shaky, had tried so desperately to get to him the night before, but there were complications with Dorota and she just couldn't make herself leave. In the haste of it all it just hadn't occurred to her to _call_ Chuck. Honestly, Chuck had been the last thing on her mind. When she had finally returned home at nearly two in the morning, she remembered, and panicked. Exhaustion claimed her, but she vowed she'd go to him first thing in the morning. When she'd found the abandoned flowers at the top of the Empire State building, she knew he'd been there and that somehow within the last 24 hours, he'd given up. She hoped with her words she could revive his desire to be with her. Now it seemed that could never be the case.

She didn't say another word, didn't know what she _could_ say. She just turned around and started walking towards the elevator, her heart completely broken all over again. She couldn't believe he wouldn't make an exception for her. _Had he really built his walls up so high that if she didn't meet his exact terms, she would be only a memory to him and that he would try desperately to forget?_ The lump in her throat refused to subside. She felt herself break the closer she got to leaving.

In one of her fairytales, he would have stopped her from leaving. He would've confessed his still constant undying love for her and that he would take her back, and that she was worth it, that _they_ were worth it. But once she reached the elevator and pressed the button and the doors slid open, she gave up all hope for that wonderful possibility.

_Life is not a fairytale_, she reminded herself.

Her last shred of hope evaporated and her shoulders slunk over as she stepped into the elevator.

"Blair! Wait!"

She'd hardly registered the sound, or the fact that it had been repeated several times, but when a hand came in to stop the elevator doors from closing and Chuck's steady eyes and heavy breaths were boring into her, she could not stop herself from staring. She couldn't say anything. He stepped into the elevator, stalked to her and wrapped his arms around her. Not another moment passed before they were lost in the whirlwind of a mind-blowing, passionate kiss that would span the ages. They would tell their grandchildren about it until they were sick and weak in the knees and most definitely still in the stage of thinking the other gender was utterly disgusting.

"Meet me for an early lunch?" he asked, his forehead pinned to hers when they'd parted. They were both breathing so very heavily and it was hard to distinguish whose breath from the others. A sparkling flame of hope lit up in Blair and she felt the lightest she'd ever felt, the most swept up in him she felt she'd ever be. She nodded subtly.

"Okay," she whispered, her fingers fisting the fabric clinging to the back of his shirt. She tilted her head up ever so slightly and he kissed her again. She could get lost in that kiss forever.

Finally he exited the elevator and let the door close. _Twenty minutes_, he mouthed. She nodded, small smile on his face. When the doors finally closed, he ran a hand through his hair. He couldn't believe he'd just done that. His fear of losing her had just been too strong. And somehow the idea of having her if only for a few hours was better than a lifetime without her with her wondering what she'd done wrong to make him refuse her for what was a perfectly good excuse.

"Chuck?" a voice moaned, interrupting his thoughts.

He turned around to see the sleepy-headed, yawning, still unstable Jenny Humphrey stumbling out of his bedroom in _his_ shirt. _Shit_.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed. It's so angsty I know, and I'm hoping they don't actually sleep together on the show. But if I make this as bad as I think it can get and fix it, then I think I'll be better prepared to handle the episode, should it go that route. XD Please review!


	2. Shudder Shock

A/N: Well, I have so much angsty tension built up from being unable to get that horrific promo out of my head…*shudders* I simply must write more of this today. Lol. I may even have to update again, since I'm not planning on having the CBJD confrontation until next chapter. *sigh* Sad. Oh, and I've outlined the majority of this fic and it's already up to 6 chapters, but I'm pretty sure it's not gonna go on much farther than that. I don't intend to attach more hidden SLs. Heh. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews. I wasn't sure how much attention this fic was gonna get. XD You're all wonderful. Please continue to review. =)

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**Ch.2—Shudder Shock**

"Jenny," he said casually, taking in her appearance. Her undergarments were still on, thank God. But the only other garment she wore was the white button down shirt he'd laid beside her on the small table by the bed. "I see you found my shirt."

Her face turned a very light shade of pink. Normally he'd be smirking at this. Back in the days when… well, it had only really been Blair that he'd dared to flirt with the morning after. The lump revived itself in his stomach.

"Chuck—" she began, walking towards him. He held up a hand and she stopped instantly. She looked like a deer caught in the headlights. He could have sworn she was leaning forward just a bit like she had been ready to take the next step and had halted half-way.

"Last night," he said, trying to keep his voice at a neutral level. She hadn't forced him into anything. There would be no point in getting mad at her. He did care about her on some level, and what they did had been a mutual decision. They had both been lost and needy. A flash of memory crossed his eyes as he remembered her small hands frantically moving all over his body. He shook his head to erase the image.

"It didn't mean anything," he finished. She nodded, and he immediately could tell she felt uncomfortable, like she didn't know what to do next. She went for supposed assumptions.

"Of course not," she shrugged. "You were just here, Chuck. It was just coincidence."

He nodded, analyzing her face and how she moved. She was a little agitated, a little anxious. There was so much fire and emotional trauma underlining her casual language. He didn't want to talk about it, but he couldn't ignore it. He looked away from her, afraid of seeing some blatant vulnerability – the same that had been in their eyes the night before, before they'd…

He blinked away the images again, completely and utterly disgusted with himself.

"Right, well, I'm about to meet up with Blair, so—"

"Oh my God!" her excitement got the best of her and she rushed towards him. "Are you guys back together?! That's so great, oh my gosh!" She was nearly jumping and it severely irritated him. He moved his head around in some effort to calm her.

"Okay, okay, Jenny!" he finally shouted, his eyes dead-set pinned on hers. He was glaring at her now and she recoiled, almost as if burned.

"S-sorry," she managed, looking down. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. Then, without thinking he placed a hand on her shoulder to reassure her.

"I didn't mean to snap at you," he said softly. She nodded slowly.

"I know." Then, she looked up at him, a small smile playing on her lips, and he realized that his hand was still on her shoulder. Immediately, he took it off and stepped away.

"So, I uh," he cleared his throat and moved across the room, "I need you to go."

She nodded. "Oh yeah, of course," she said, nodding cheerfully, as if it were obvious. Truly, it was obvious. But outside of that suite lay the real world. While Chuck may have possibilities and everyone didn't directly hate him for what he'd done, she had no one. All she'd had was Chuck. She should've known it was only for one night. Right now he was the only person she felt safe with, comfortable to be around. Though obviously the morning had brought awkwardness.

"And I'll be needing my shirt back," he said. The last thing he wanted to see was Blair eyeing his shirt in Jenny's closet.

The blonde looked down at the shirt and started unbuttoning it. Chuck made a disapproving sound and she looked up at him, shocked and scared it looked like.

"What?" she asked, though she knew full well what he was reacting to. She wasn't even going to try and be playful that he'd already seen her naked, and definitely seen plenty of girls undressing before him. She was sure he hadn't found the sight so appalling then.

Nonetheless, she buttoned it back up and smiled awkwardly at him.

"Sorry, I'll just uh…get dressed in your room," she said, awkwardly moving away from him and only turning around towards the bedroom once she'd gotten out of his line of vision. She by no means wanted him to think she was trying to seduce him by showing him her backside. She didn't want him like that. She'd just needed him last night. In that moment, she knew he was the only one that'd understand. Their emotions just crumbled into passion without warning. Now she just wanted the brotherly companionship she'd had with him, because the brothers, friends and anyone else that she'd had, she'd lost. It was impossible to get that back with him though after what they'd done. Soon Blair would know, and then _everyone_ would, and then she'd be lucky if she got out alive.

Chuck sighed and crossed the room, collapsing on the couch. He placed his head in his hands and tried very desperately to come up with a scheme to keep Blair from finding out, perhaps indefinitely. Maybe after they'd been together for awhile, it would just be a little fight that would be forgiven in a matter of weeks. Now, the sparks would start a wildfire and he would never get her back. This was his last chance.

A part of him thought he wasn't giving himself enough credit and that since Blair came around this time, she would do so in the future just because she loved him so much. But that part of him was overruled by the scolding chip-on-his-shoulder conscience that told him not to kid himself. Blair had admitted she still loved him, but the probability of that changing when she found out about Jenny was considerably high. He wondered if there was a point to trying to reconcile things with her in what was probably ten minutes now.

He groaned and dug his nails into the sides of his face. He should just tell her. He should just tell her and accept the misery that was going to be the rest of his life. He didn't have as big of a moral conscience as Nathaniel who'd been stupid enough to tell Blair he'd cheated on her. He could avoid the topic…until it gnawed at him that lying was almost worse than repeating the act, except this time when they were together. He sighed. He could never do that to her. _But God, she had tasted so good when he'd kissed her not too long ago._ It'd been so long since he'd felt her lips pressed against his and their tongues twisting together. He _had_ when she been standing in his elevator. Tingles had shot through him and he almost cried, wondering how long it would last. What he wouldn't give to hold her in his arms forever.

The clicking of heels was heard from the hallway and he looked up to see Jenny's form re-entering the room she'd just left. She was wearing the dress she'd worn the night before, a few rumples were spotted across the fabric.

"I uh…folded and," she swallowed hard, unable to keep her eyes on his for more than a couple spare seconds, "put your shirt back on your side of the bed," she said.

He just nodded, accepting the fact. A million little other facts shot through his head though. There was the fact that his button down shirts were always hung up, not folded and put in drawers. Blair always hung up his things when she was done with them. _Ache_. The offense he'd taken but not shown to her pointing out _his_ side of the bed like the other side was _hers_. It was _not_ hers. It was, and always would be, Blair's. These were probably insignificant things, but he couldn't help thinking them.

"Bye," she waved awkwardly, approaching the elevator. She didn't want to say _thanks_ because it was clear what they had done was a mistake. She wasn't about to ask him how he was doing, because the almost sympathy from the night before had led to their mistake of a life time. So, she just left, and he let her because he was too consumed in Blair Waldorf to think how Jenny Humphrey would survive the outside world alone, and without him.

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"Dan?"

"Bl-Blair?" he asked, clearly confused. She looked pretty confused as well, but she stepped further outside of the elevator and walked towards him.

"What are you doing here?" she asked curiously. Maybe she had been a little absent from The Empire since everything that had blown up with Chuck, but Dan was never there. She couldn't remember a single time, except maybe when Chuck had thrown his first big party in the fall.

"I could ask you the same question, couldn't I?"

She smirked.

"I mean, aren't things with…?"

"I'm friends with Nate too," she said, "but yes, I did come here on account with Chuck."

Dan's eyes widened suddenly. "W-wait, you…you two…are you two backed together?" he asked, almost gaping. She was amused.

"Well, nothing's for certain," she said, smiling like an idiot, "but I think we're making progress."

"That's great, Blair," he said. "I'm glad you've been able to work everything out."

"Yes, well, like I said, there are still some kinks, but Chuck and Blair, Blair and Chuck, kind of a package deal."

He laughed. "Yes, I have observed this in action."

She was amused. "All right, I told you my story. Now how about you? Last I recall, The Empire isn't really your playground." She raised her eyebrows. It suddenly brought him crashing back to reality.

"I was looking for Jenny," he admitted. Her eyebrows furrowed together.

"Jenny," she said neutrally.

"Yeah, have you seen her? I mean, up in Chuck's suite? By any chance?"

She laughed a little uncomfortably and raised her eyebrows again. "No, should I have?" She'd hardly been able to think straight with the tense conversation she'd shared with Chuck. And since he'd kissed her in the elevator she'd been up in the sky, day dreaming of when it'd next happen again.

He sighed and pursed his lips. "No, I uh…she just, well, she was spending time with Nate, but…maybe that was bad…" he shook his head, "I don't really know, I just…I'm worried about her…"

"You're rambling," she cut him off. He looked up at her, close to smiling just a little but not quite there. He sighed in resignation. "Come on, Humphrey," she turned him around and directed him towards the exit. "I'm 99.9999% sure that Jenny isn't up in that suite, but if she is, I'm sure she just crashed and I know you don't want a cranky sixteen year old on your hands."

He laughed lightly. "Yeah, that would probably be…unfortunate for me."

She smirked. "Why don't you tell me what's all been going on?" she said once they'd gotten outside and started walking down the sidewalk. "I don't have to meet up with Chuck for twenty minutes."

He blanched at her. "Blair Waldorf is throwing extra time to the wind to walk and talk with Dan Humphrey?" he looked at her in mock-surprise, though clearly very suspicious of her decision.

"Chuck has always found me beautiful, Humphrey. Besides," she sighed. He detected the note of sadness in it. "I don't even know if we're back together yet…officially."

He pursed his lips and looked at her. When the silence became unbearable, Blair turned her head to look at him. "You sure you don't just wanna get ready for your date?"

She rolled her eyes. "It's not a date, Humphrey."

He looked like he was about to say something but held his tongue. "Blair—"

"No!" she silenced him with wide eyes and a trying tongue. "Tell me about Jenny. Then _maybe_ I'll let you in on my _fears_ and _anxiety_ regarding Chuck," she joked, but he knew underneath that witty layer was some sort of vulnerability. Something deep inside him wanted to discover that and make it go away, give her some peace. He'd never been overly fond of Blair Waldorf over the years, but he had found some contentment and even pride in making her feel better on occasion.

He looked up at the mildly populated New York streets and smiled softly to himself. He'd been running around all morning looking for Jenny. Things were a bit tense at home because no one knew where she was. Rufus was frantic, even if it had been only for one night. Her and there Dan had heard about some things she'd gotten into, but it wasn't until Nate and Serena confirmed the rumors that he began to truly worry. He hadn't been real connected to his younger sister lately, and now he wished he was. He disapproved of what she was doing, and he let her know it too, before he'd even really had any real proof. She hadn't defended herself too much and so he suspected it was true. Now all he wanted to do was hold her.

He sighed and parted his lips, ready to begin the long tale, with _Blair Waldorf_ of all people. "Jenny was into drugs awhile back," he said. Blair was unaffected, probably because she'd spent most of her life around Chuck or Nate, but it actually meant something to him. "She wasn't taking any herself, but…she was aiding in the dealing."

Blair raised her eyebrows. "Go on."

"Well, she put a wedge between Serena and Nate. She deliberately tried to steal him away, and in the most manipulative ways." He shook his head, in disbelief as he recalled all the incidents where he'd learned of her clever schemes. "I should have known when she'd showed up with drinks for Chuck and Nate some weeks ago that it couldn't have been good." He chuckled in his own misery. "She was hardly wearing anything!" He sighed, putting a hand to his forehead and kneading the skin roughly.

"When was this…drinking night?" she asked cautiously. She was about to tell him that none of it was his fault and sometimes these things can't be helped, that in the end it is up to the individual what he or she actually does. But she couldn't help her curiosity. She suddenly had a very sick feeling in her stomach.

"Oh, uh," he sighed, his mind running ramped trying to remember. He was so frustrated by it all that he'd hardly thought to hold on to details. "Oh!" he said, suddenly remembering. He turned to her and pointed his finger in what she guessed was almost excitement and what he'd found. "It was that night you insisted on me taking you to a party where you could make Chuck jealous by kissing some guy?" he raised his eyebrows, hoping to get a playful rise in return.

She gasped though and her eyes widened.

"What is it?" he asked, worried. She shook her head, scolding herself for feeling so ridiculous. There was no connection between Chuck and Jenny. The last time they'd been 'intimate', he'd almost raped her. Nate had obviously stayed faithful to Serena or they wouldn't still be on such lovey-dovey terms with each other.

"Nothing," she said. He did not look convinced. "I'm serious! Nothing!" she insisted. Her fierce tone and volume told Dan he'd better quit while he was ahead, so he just forced himself to ignore the warning signs of a Blair Waldorf meltdown and resumed talking about the innocent little sister he _used_ to know.

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40 minutes.

He'd been waiting _forty minutes_.

The last time she'd been late, he'd been left heartbroken and screwing Jenny Humphrey just to erase the pain, to numb the death that had decided to finally take over him at the confirmation of Blair's absent love. He had no one else, and his only strength was in Bass Industries. He was _just_ like his father. It was worse than not succeeding in the corporate world. He had never felt so broken in his entire life as he did when midnight came and Blair had failed to show at their designated location.

He would not repeat his mistake with Jenny Humphrey, or any other girl for that matter. But he couldn't help the fact that he was breaking inside. He was already beginning to lose the memory of her lips on his. He wanted to force himself back to an hour earlier when he'd held her in his arms. For that split second the world had been perfect, or nearly so. Now it threatened to break into a million pieces all over again.

He'd texted her, five minutes before the twenty he'd suggested. The classy restaurant recently installed on the top of the Empire State building, just where he'd wanted to take her the night before after they'd sufficiently admired the city and swayed together to the warming breeze and buzz of excitable children. His eyes closed in mourning. There was so much he'd had planned. _How could it have all gotten so screwed up?_

_"You have no one to blame but yourself."_

He sighed shakily and ran a hand through his hair. Her return - _**be there - **_text was simple enough but it sent his heart racing. He didn't know what to do or how to act or even exactly how to go about doing what he wasn't even sure he was supposed to do. He was so unbelievably torn and half-contemplated calling up Nate and asking him what to do. He wondered if he'd felt so completely pained when he'd told Blair he cheated on her, or if he just did it with the intention of possibly hooking up with Serena after Blair broke up with him, which she didn't. None of them did, but it didn't stop Nate's possibly sly motivations.

His throat felt incredibly tight but he dared not loosen his tie. He had cleaned himself up well and all for Blair. All he wanted was to do this right, but he couldn't help thinking that it would be all a waste once she found out about Jenny. They weren't in high school anymore. The gossip and secrets was always going to come out, they'd realized. There was no point in trying to hide it. He was so torn up. He just wished he could have taken back the last twenty-four hours. Maybe he could go back in time and tell his past self not to sleep with Jenny Humphrey, because in the morning one night of almost not-loneliness would lead to further destruction than he could have ever imagined.

"Mr. Bass?"

He looked up at the waiter that had annoyingly stopped by every five to ten minutes to ask if his party was still going to arrive. Quite frankly, Chuck had grown sick of it. With every reoccurrence of the question, he found himself growing more impatient, both with the waiter and with himself.

"She's _coming_," he spat, his eyes narrowing. The waiter's eyes went wide and he straightened himself before quickly scurrying off with nothing but a – "_yes, Mr. Bass"_ – left in his wake.

Maybe he should have called her or asked what was keeping her, but he still wanted her to come, and while there was a possibility she might come to her senses or overhear what had happened in his suite the night before by some unknown spy, he decided not to push her. He had swallowed hard more than a few times, and occasionally broke into a sweat, dabbing his forehead with the exquisite napkin placed formally along the side of his plate.

His eyes grazing the horizon hardly became aware of his phone lighting up. He felt the vibration emanating off the table where he'd set it and after a few moments he immediately sprung forward and eagerly checked to see who it was. He'd been so anxious to hear from her. He only hoped something was not wrong with them, or wrong with her. If she was physically hurt it would only be one more boulder to the huge burden he was carrying.

It was not Blair.

A feeling he could not explain filled him to the brim. It was not just fear or anger or panic. It was all of them combined in one with shame and guilt treading their feet along the edges of this feeling he could not explain. He tried his very best not to lose his cool, but his hands began to shake. He cursed everything. His life, the whole world, his stupid mistakes, and the fact that he'd been thinking with his head instead of his heart for the last month. It had all led down to this. This was his fate. To be parted forever from Blair Waldorf.

………….

**This just in, Upper East Siders. Apparently last night was not all fire and flames. Two lonely souls united as one. As it appears Chuck Bass never lets his potential conquests go without a fight. Two years later and he finally claimed Little J. Watch out, ladies. The Bass name's not one to meddle with.**

**-Gossip Girl**

…………

The more he looked at it, the more he gaped, and the more the sick feeling overwhelmed him. For a brief second he wondered if Jenny knew, and if she was okay. Only for a brief second.

"Sir?"

The waiter came around again. _Damn him_. It hadn't even been five minutes this time. He looked up at him quickly with sharp angry eyes.

"_Check, please_," he almost growled. The man looked horrified but scampered off to retrieve the check for the constant refill of scotch Chuck had practically been breathing in for the last forty-five minutes. His glass was empty now and his shaking was becoming almost visible. No more than two minutes in Blair's arms and his chances were gone.

_Was it worth it to fight for her? Did he have a choice? _When it came to Blair Waldorf: _absolutely_ _not_. If she was going to kill him, it would be to his face with her screaming anguish echoing in his ears forever.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed. =) Please review! CB confrontation next chapter, promise. ;) No more updates tonight though. This one took me forever. Lol.


	3. All This Heartbreak

A/N: Well, last night I barely had a single nightmare over the promo, so that's encouraging. XD Are you ready for the CB confrontation? Are you? *gasp* I'm gonna try to use all the dialogue from the promo that I can for this one intense scene. *gulp* I hope you enjoy. Please review! =D

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**Ch.3—All This Heartbreak**

_Someone grabbed hold of her hand. By its feel and texture and the way it wrapped so fiercely around her graceful fingers, she knew exactly who it was. She tried to pull away but his hand held fast. When she finally spun around to meet his piercing brown eyes, he released her._

_ "Blair?" the man she'd come with asked from down the hall. He'd just gone to grab her jacket and then they were going to leave for their date. The schemes for the evening had gone about successfully, and she no longer needed to act the part of Chuck's date._

_ Her head turned to greet his questioning eyes._

_ "I'll be just a minute, Cameron. Wait for me outside," she said politely. The man nodded briefly and gathered their coats up in his arms, heading for the exit. _

_ Blair's head swiveled around to greet Chuck's determined gaze once more._

_ "What do you want, Chuck? The night is over."_

_ He almost didn't speak, and she almost left, but then his lips parted and she could not make herself move a single inch. She did not look it, but she was certainly enraptured with him and whatever he was trying to do._

_ "It's not just me you can't forgive."_

_ She blinked, hardly expecting this route in regards to getting her back. And she knew he was trying to. He'd been trying it all evening and most often she played it off as nothing, so she didn't have to feel the pain of rejecting him. Her heart still burned so intensely for him, even if she told herself she could never go back._

_ "It's you, too," he told her._

_ She sighed, sounding annoyed. "Yes, I know, Chuck. But what's done is done and I don't plan on going back, so if you could just—"_

_ "I did the most dangerous thing when I told you I loved you."Her mouth snapped shut at his words, and she found she could not look away. There he was again, using his love as a tool to lower her defenses. "If I got through my fear for you, you can get through yours for me."_

_ His hand gently cupped her cheek for a moment as he spoke and she found her eyes closing at the contact. The feel of him consumed her and his words ran over her like sweet summer honey. It was intoxicating and she knew she had to get out of there_

_ "You're never going to be safe," he said, causing her eyes to snap open. Somehow he'd seen the cause to her break-up, the true cause of where it'd originated from. "I know you're afraid you'll do something horrible because of how you feel, but there's no such thing as loving too much, Blair. All you have to do is create boundaries for yourself."_

_ Her lips parted and she wanted to say something but found she could not._

_ "I know you've forgiven me," he said softly. Her eyebrows narrowed._

_ "You don't know that," she said, hating that he quite possibly had the upper hand. He was most definitely toying with her emotions and she didn't like that. She didn't like that her control over the situation had completely slipped out of her grasp._

_ "Two days," he told her, ignoring her defense. She looked at him strangely, not understanding. "I will be on the top of the Empire State building," he said. "If you're willing to take another chance on us, then meet me. We'll figure this out." Her lips parted, and a gnawing desire to do exactly what he said but right at that moment was threatening to eat her alive. She was so very tense, even if he could not see it. _

_ "But if you don't come," he continued, "then I'll close my heart to you forever."_

_ A breath caught in her throat and she felt her eyes watering. She cursed herself for being so affected by him and his words but she could not help her emotions. She hated that he'd put up such an ultimatum. Sure, he had broken her heart and she'd made it clear it'd been too much for her actually to stay with him, but what if miraculously something happened in the future and she couldn't stand to be without him? Did that really mean he wouldn't let her in if she didn't come meet him in two days? The thought made her furious and suddenly she was very angry by the proposition he'd put up to her. She hated it, hated him and his ultimatum._

_ "Blair?" a wandering Cameron re-entered the building. He couldn't see her and Chuck but she had called for her and her mind jolted back to the fact that she was supposed to be on a date with him, on a date with a guy she hadn't known her whole life and who she could start out fresh with. With Chuck's words washing over her though, she began to wonder if he were right, and if no one really would measure up to what they had._

_ "Coming!" she called to him, briefly turning away from Chuck. Her dress swooshed with her and it seemed the only sound in the entire building, despite the numbed buzzing of socialites chatting it away in the distant ballroom. _

_ She saw as Cameron left the building once more, not looking annoyed in the least, and suddenly she felt she had to get away. She had to escape whatever the hell Chuck was offering, because she'd given him so much of herself and he'd taken advantage of it and broken her heart. _

_ "I have to go, Chuck," she said pointedly, when she could not stand looking into his hopeful, heart-wrenching face a moment longer. She turned to move away and actually got a considerable distance when he called to her. Cautiously she turned back around to face him, her heart beating a million miles a second. Slowly he walked towards here._

_ "Two days," he said._

_ "Chuck," she almost whined, her eyes closing and her head briefly shaking because she was so very overwhelmed at the offer he'd put on the table._

_ "Are you brave enough or aren't you?" _

_ Her eyes snapped to his, wide and unmoving. Her lips parted in an almost gasp and she could not make herself turn away. She felt like she was glued to the floor, caught up in some wet cement trap and that her eyes could not stop sinking into hers. Not a moment longer, Chuck cupped her chin in his hand again and moved past her. Very slowly she turned to watch him walk away, and went to Cameron out on the street who was eagerly waiting for her. _

Chuck entered the lobby at The Empire and felt the shaking that had progressed throughout the ride home significantly increase. He couldn't be sure that she'd seen the blast yet, but he was banking on that she had. He wasn't going to just let her go like he'd told her he was going to three days ago. He loved her too damn much and her showing up, even if it was a day late, meant she did too. He was going to stop pitying himself and fight for the woman he loved.

Blair strode out of the elevator in a fury. She didn't spot him on instant but soon after her fiery gaze met with his and she exploded into endless sparks of fire. She didn't want to talk to him. She just wanted to kill him. He had broken her heart all over again, before it had even completely mended. And what was worse was that he lied to her. He could have told her that morning, just to be decent and honest, and then at least she could have given him credit for that. But no, he hadn't. And now she knew the truth. There was no way she'd ever take him back. She wanted him out of her life. _Permanently_.

Chuck's eyes lit up when he saw Blair walk out of the elevator. A queasy feeling bubbled in his stomach when he saw the scorned, hurt look on her face. And when he saw the attempt she was making to just ignore him and move past him, forget he existed, all manner of sanity escaped him. His eyes widened in panic.

"Blair, wait—" he called out to her, grabbing onto her arm. She spun around to face him but snapped her arm away immediately. Her eyes were angry and he was sure if it were humanly possible, there would be smoke coming out of her ears and nostrils.

"What, Chuck?!" she was close to screaming at him and he couldn't tell if she was actually holding herself back or if more was just adding on to the second. "Is there something you'd like to tell me?" she fumed.

"Blair—"

"I came for you, Chuck," she said before he could continue. "I freaking put my life on hold, because you had convinced me that maybe we were still worth it, maybe we could get past the horror that was the last month of our life, but once again!" she spat, "you proved me wrong." Her eyes narrowed.

He felt broken, but he couldn't help the swell of anger that steadily rose to the surface.

"You didn't come for me, Blair," he said, low and dark.

"Dorota was in labor!" she shrieked.

"You didn't come. I waited there until midnight. There was no word from you. I thought that was it. You made me _believe_ that was it."

She scoffed. "Don't try to pin this on me, you Basstard. You couldn't wait one day before fucking some slut, and of course it just happened to be—"

"Jenny Humphrey meant no—"

"Don't say her name!" she shrieked. Her entire body was convulsing against her and she felt like she was going to explode. When she'd gotten the blast, she felt herself shatter into a million pieces. Dan had tried to comfort her in some way, but she had hardly registered his presence. Then they'd taken off for The Empire. Blair was sure she'd catch them in the act and then that would be the end for him, for Chuck and Blair.

"Why did you do it?!" she huffed, almost crying. Her eyes were still flaming anger.

"I thought you didn't love me anymore!"

She didn't know if she was more furious at what he'd done or what he'd thought to make him do what he did. It'd been a _month_. She'd known no one, herself included, to get over someone so quickly, especially someone that meant so much as Chuck did to her.

"So, you did this to get back at me?! To turn me into some cold-hearted bitch who'll never find love because I can't get the fucking picture of you and—" she couldn't say her name. It horrified her too much. So, she just paused, screamed with her mouth closed and her eyes squeezed shut before she looked at him again. "Out of my head!" she finished. He wasn't sure but he thought the sound of her voice might be crossing the line into sobs.

She told herself she wasn't going to cry. She was too furious to. She would scream and yell and spew insults and hurtful things at him and then she would leave, and _then_ she would cry. When she got home and she was alone, she would cry forever for what they'd been and how he'd completely broken her until the point where she just couldn't feel anymore.

And she _didn't_ cry. Her eyes just blazed at him in anger. She wanted to take the flowers that she'd accidentally left in his suite and rip them to shreds. She wanted there to be no memory of happiness between them and only anger and hate. She wanted to be rid of him forever.

"I didn't cheat on you!" he said, and her eyes widened at what he was using to justify himself.

"You might as well have!" she cried out. There were no tears seeping from her eyes and she didn't plan on there being any, but she had to fight to keep the anger as evident to his eyes as she could. Her voice lowered as she continued. "We may have still been broken up when it happened, but you made me _believe_ in us again," her breath caught in her throat, and he found the same effect bestowed on him. "After you offered up that horrible ultimatum, I believed that we could try again and maybe we'd work and maybe we'd be even better than before. I took a step outside of my heartbreak and gave you another chance because I realized I could not live with myself if you shut me out forever!"

She was screaming at him now and he didn't know how to react, how to function.

"You didn't show!" he found himself shouting back. Her angry face didn't change and he knew he couldn't possibly use the excuse again. It was all he had, but it was pathetic and it did not make up for the angry pain engrained so deeply on her face.

She nodded, angry. "And so you stuck to your promise, didn't you? To your _threat_," she spat at him, "you said if I didn't come, you'd shut me out forever."

"Blair—" he sounded so weak now. All he wanted was her. It was a stupid threat, but he just wouldn't let himself live his life, even just possibly, drowning in how he'd lost Blair Waldorf. He'd nearly become an alcoholic when he'd done that in high school and he did not plan on wasting his life away, with the aching hope that maybe they would come back together again.

"I guess forever started at 12:01, didn't it?" her voice was quiet, angry, filled with hatred and hurt. She despised him like none other and it made him burn inside at the thought of her crying over this later that night. He'd known she would break and he'd just wanted to get it over with, but now that he was at the scene of the crime, he wished he hadn't been so eager to go through with it.

Before he could respond to her words though, or even think of how to respond, the ding of the elevator interrupted them and Chuck steadied himself, prepared to play off to whatever guest at the hotel that nothing out of the particular was happening.

"You son of a bitch," was heard directly behind, coming toward him. Chuck had heard the voice before, and with venom attached too.

_"That, is my little sister!"_

He knew what was coming even as he turned around. Dan Humphrey's fist came into harsh contact with his face and he swore it hurt worse than it had the first time. The pain was unbearable, most likely because now there were feeling involved. He didn't have to second guess that. When Dan had punched him the first time, he'd been physically hurt, offended and pissed, but now Dan's punch held so much more meaning to it. And that meaning was also attached to Blair.

"I can't even look at you," he scoffed, looking away. "I can't believe," he continued, talking slowly so as to emphasize every word, "that I was stupid enough to think you'd grow up and be a decent person."

Chuck's lips parted as he tried desperately to search for an answer.

"I…"

"You took my sister's virginity! My little sister!" Blair cringed at the words, despite what it meant for her and Chuck. It was burning Dan too.

Chuck's eyes were wide, panicked, and searching.

"And look what you did to _Blair_!" he shrieked, waving his hand about in a wild gesture to the brunette in green standing beside him. Blair was shocked to say the least when he defended her but was still too angry at Chuck to acknowledge it. Chuck felt a similar way and pain flashed across his eyes at the angry, assaulting words that he knew he very much deserved.

He scoffed. "You've got nothing to say," he shook his head at him. "You've got nothing to fucking say?!" he was screaming at Chuck and even Blair was blown away by his behavior. Somehow it was so much more severe than hers had been, and she had literally torn him to pieces. Neither of them had seen Dan like this, acting so violently.

Dan moved towards Chuck again, obviously planning on punching or pushing him around some more but Blair pulled him away. Dan accepted the restraint surprisingly but his eyes were still dead set on Chuck's.

"Let's go," Blair told Dan, eager to get away from this place, especially with so many memories intact and Dan's ferocity beginning to scare her. Dan did not seem to be aware of her request. "Dan," she requested again. Maybe he had heard her but he made no effort to show it. With her holding him back by his shoulders, he took one more dangerous step towards Chuck.

"Where is she?" he demanded, his voice low. Chuck stared at him, dumbfounded. "Where is she?" he ground out again. Chuck tried to find the air in him and around him to breathe, but was having difficulty trying to do so.

"I…I don't—"

Dan scoffed, turning away. "Oh, that's rich. That's _real_ rich," he walked away from him, pacing a little, completely infuriated to the point of maybe he could have killed Chuck at that moment if the security cameras had not been on and Blair had not been there to witness the event.

Chuck sighed, his eyes deadpanned on Dan Humphrey. "I told her to leave this morning after Blair came over. I didn't want—"

"She was in your suite when I came over?!" Blair shrieked, her voice sounding smaller somehow and so incredibly hurt. Chuck's gaze shifted to hers and she looked away from him, unable to stand the sight of his pleading eyes that held nothing but guilt.

"Blair…"

"I can't believe you did this to me." She heaved a shaky sigh and ran a hand through her hair, turning to Dan before he lunged himself at Chuck again. "Come on, Dan. Let's get out of here."

Dan did not look anywhere near ready to agree to the idea, but her pleading eyes won him over, along with her restraining arms. He had not realized up until that moment that Blair Waldorf actually had some strength in her arms.

"I don't want to _be here_ anymore," she stressed. Finally he stopped struggling and looked at her, sympathetically it seemed. "Don't make an idiot out of yourself by doing something stupid you'll regret later." He blinked, and a part of him wanted to argue that it wasn't stupid if it was defending his sister's honor. But he saw the hidden hurt in her; the way she looked at him was as if she was looking at Chuck the night before, directly before he had slept with Jenny.

"We've already seen how that ends up." With a teary sigh, she released him and walked towards the exit. Dan was heartbroken for her and his face fell. Before she'd reached the doors, he made to follow her, leaving Chuck with a heated glare on his departure.

……………………………………………………………………

It took over an hour, but Blair Waldorf tracked down Jenny Humphrey wallowing in her sorrows and guilt on the far side of the city. The brunette hadn't wanted to attack her right there on the spot, so she arranged for two separate cars to take them to the rooftop of one of the looming skyscrapers in the middle of the city. Jenny didn't want to know what to say to her. The fact that she had hardly said anything to her in broad daylight where people might overhear was an immediate tip-off. When she refused to share the same car with her, that made her even more nervous.

She was nervous and she didn't say anything. There they stood on the top of an anonymous skyscraper in the great New York City, and she didn't say a word.

"I think you know what I brought you here for, Jenny."

Hesitantly, Jenny looked up from the spot she'd glued for eyes to for the last ten minutes or so, since they'd been up there, and she found Blair's deep brown orbs. She wasn't shaking, but Blair must have seen the fear ready to pop from her eyes. Still, she didn't say anything.

"I talked to Chuck this morning," Blair continued.

"I-I know," Jenny said very quietly, not realizing her mistake until afterwards.

"Of course you do. You were still there when I got there."

Jenny closed her eyes in agony and swallowed hard. When she opened her eyes again, Blair was looking at her quite calmly. She couldn't understand it. _If she was so pissed, why wasn't she taking it out on her?_ Her fury couldn't have caused such calm. Unless, of course, it was the calm before the storm.

"Blair, it's not—"

"What I think?" she finished the statement, looking amused. Jenny's eyes were watering. "Oh, I think it's exactly what I think." She paused, scanning the blonde's frightened face. "You slept with him," she said knowingly, slowly, quietly. Jenny let out a shaky sigh.

"I didn't wa—"

"Are you seriously going to pretend that you didn't _enjoy_ the experience?" Blair asked, looking amused, but Jenny would have been blind not to see the venom that laced her every word. "He's _very_ experienced," she confided, as if the girl didn't already know, as if the whole city didn't know. Jenny swallowed hard, her eyes squeezed tight for a moment, trying to prevent any eruption of guilty tears.

"Or," she took on a different approach, "are you horrified that you lost your virginity to _Chuck Bass_?" her plastic smile burned Jenny. "I know I certainly was," Blair said. "When _I_ lost it to him, I mean." Jenny swallowed hard again. "Though, I must admit I wasn't too pleased when I heard of your experience. At least though, you got to wake up in a soft, comfortable bed. You got the mature Chuck with slight misjudgment last night. I, unfortunately, only got the sticky interior of a limo and was dropped off at my house not long after the experience even ended." She daintily flipped some curls of her own off her shoulders.

Jenny was about to burst and Blair smirked at the fact that the younger blonde was about to explode right in front of her on the count of her rambles. _She deserved it._

"Perhaps the next time you two—"

"S-stop! Just stop!" Jenny yelled, her eyes finally flashing back to Blair's. Blair hardly reacted to the sudden outburst. Though her lips did form an _'o'_ when Jenny's watering eyes pleaded with her. "It didn't mean _anything_," she stressed, "I just…needed someone," she finished lamely.

Blair's eyes narrowed. It seemed she was finally starting to lower part of her mask to reveal her malice over the situation. "It's your own fault that nobody else was there for you, Jenny," she said coldly. Jenny felt chilled to the bone at her words, but knew they were truer than ever and so forced herself to accept what life had bestowed upon her.

"What do you want?" she asked very quietly. There was no point in trying to defend herself or Chuck in any way. Blair must've been very hurt when she heard the news. That of course would only fuel her anger, and her…revenge. "I mean, uh…" Jenny stupidly continued, "what are you going to do to me?"

Blair smirked, almost impressed that the little girl would ask what sort of cruel punishment she would receive due to sleeping with the notorious Chuck Bass, her recent ex. She sighed, quite happy with herself. It was the only contentedness she'd felt throughout the entire experience, since halfway through her conversation with Dan that morning.

Jenny daringly looked up at her. "Blair?" she asked, feeling immediately afterwards that speaking was probably not in her best interest at that particular moment.

"I've spoken with Dan…"

Jenny parted her lips, shocked. _Would Dan actually aid Blair in his own sister's destruction?_

"The two of us have…arranged things that you'll most wonderfully be informed about the moment you get home." Her plastic smile was back and smile, wide and deceiving as ever, bringing a dull sparkle to her eyes. "You're leaving the city, Jenny," her smiling face dropped completely, the menace back in place. "And I'm going to make sure you stay out of the city."

Now Jenny's face dropped, panic and pale coloring filling it completely. "But, this city's all I am!" she protested, forgetting her own vow to stop talking temporarily.

Blair's cocky, evil grin turned into a hard, stone cold glare. "You should have thought of that before you slept with my ex-boyfriend."

"That's just it, Blair!" Suddenly she was defensive, and she didn't know where it came from, but she didn't question. Goodness knows when she'd feel justified again. "He was your ex-boyfriend."

"He still is!" Blair shouted, losing control of herself for a moment.

"Then why are you punishing me like I'm the skank you caught him cheating with?!"

"Because I love him!" she was almost sobbing now, and Jenny immediately felt bad. She gasped, horrified at what she'd just done. "And," she cleared her throat, resuming her calm behavior. "We were going to get back together."

"You didn't show, Blair. He was _broken_," Jenny's eyes narrowed in on her. She scolded herself for going down this path again. She didn't want to get on Blair's bad side anymore than she was, but the brunette didn't seem to have entirely considered every aspect of the situation. She needed to make sure she did that.

"And naturally, you decided to take on the responsibility to fix him?" Blair spat back. Jenny closed her eyes in frustration. _This was getting nowhere._

"I was broken too," she ground out. Blair scoffed.

"You disgust me," she looked at her in extreme distaste. "_Both_ of you do."

Jenny looked at her, unsure of how to really continue. She certainly didn't feel the need to justify the situation any further.

"So, you're not even going to give him another chance?" she asked, sounding a little desperate. More than anything, right at that moment she wanting things to work out for Chuck with Blair. She'd seen the anxiety in his eyes that morning at the very real possibility of losing Blair because of what they'd done. Despite the awkward conversation they'd shared, it was hard to miss.

"What goes on between me and Chuck is none of your business," she looked at her with disdain, glared, didn't want to be with her another second. Silence lingered for awhile and it became unbearable for Jenny. Blair tortured her a little while longer until she felt it was enough and she herself wanted to get the hell out of there.

"You're getting sent out of the city in a couple days, if not sooner."

Jenny's eyes flickered up to hers. The dread residing in her at that realization was evident in her eyes. The thought of leaving everybody, of leaving school, and leaving her lifestyle just flat out terrified her. She knew Serena had left for boarding school a few years back without notice, but somehow that didn't seem the same. Everybody hadn't hated _her_ when she left. They'd been worried – mostly. Nobody would care what happened to Jenny Humphrey.

"If you ever set foot back in this city, I will destroy you."

Jenny swallowed hard. The threat had been given to her in high school many times, the threat to destroy her. Somehow this time it was different. She knew it would not just involve her social life, it would involve _everything_. It would prevent _anything_ from going right in her life. She'd be the unluckiest person in the world if she ever set foot back in New York City. She was almost crying at that revelation.

"And Chuck? Aren't you going to do something to him? I didn't make this mistake on my own," she said, gathering up the remaining strength she had left in her.

Blair's eyes narrowed. "As I recall, not long ago I told you to mind your own business when it came to the matters between myself and Chuck."

Jenny nodded in shame. She had briefly forgotten that. Somehow it had not connected.

"Now," Blair said, sounding suddenly very cheerful. "I'm leaving. There's a car waiting for you just across the street. Dan is waiting for you there." She quirked an eyebrow, waiting for her reaction, but Jenny showed no new expression or agitation. "Don't follow me right away," she said. "You're not on my nice list."

Jenny made no movement and Blair left. When the soft clicking of Blair's heels had lessened significantly and she heard the cheerful sound of her greeting her limo driver down on the street, Jenny slowly made her way down the lonely steps.

………………………………………………………………………………

Blair was right, as predicted. Jenny was informed almost immediately on arrival that she would be leaving for boarding school in a couple days, the next day if it was possible. Rufus and Lily were very sympathetic to her having to leave the only place she'd ever called home, but Rufus was definitely more stern. She easily found the assumption that rested in his eyes: she would come back a changed, good girl – the little, innocent angel he'd known the majority of her life. Jenny knew that would not be the case though, her coming back at least. Blair was hardly wrong when it came to these things. And with Dan on her side, Jenny knew she was truly alone.

Plenty of it'll be fun's and you'll be home in no time's were spread around. Eric seemed genuinely sad to hear of her leaving. Serena and Nate were practically glaring though, and Dan barely looked at her, just like he'd barely looked at her all the way home. She felt so very alone. She should have never slept with Chuck. It had been the last straw. It was probably better that she had slept with him than with some herpes-infested hobo on the street. He had made her felt safe, even if it _had_ had dreadful consequences.

"Knock, knock," she heard Eric calling from just outside her room.

"Come in," she sighed, completely exhausted with her life. She was sitting on her bed, one knee crossed over the other, and hardly in the mood to speak with anyone. Eric was always the exception in her life, but he was probably the one person who didn't know everything, well, besides her dad and Lily. Everything had just become _so_ screwed up. _She hated it._

"You look like you're having…fun," he noted, seeing her little accessories scattered all over the bedroom floor and an empty suitcase sitting amongst them. A heaping pile of shirts and skirts loomed over the majority of the bed. Jenny's eyes flickered up to him and she gave a small, short, sarcastic laugh to his comment. He raised his eyebrows, slightly amused, and went to sit next to her on the bed.

"There's something I don't know, isn't there?" he looked at her, concerned. She wanted the concern to be fake, so she could just kill herself. She hardly thought anyone would notice.

"Several things, I'm sure," she returned. He smirked a little, but then it faded. She wouldn't look at him.

"Jenny, we've all done regrettable things…"

She half sighed, half scoffed at his attempt at making her feel better. There was nothing he could say that would possibly make her feel like maybe she could redeem herself.

"Stop, Eric."

He frowned and she ran a hand through her hair.

"Look, I know you're just trying to help, but there is nothing you could possibly say that would make me feel better or like I could possibly get out of this…" she grappled around for the right word, "rabbit hole," she said, sighing, only remembering later that what she was in now was exactly what Chuck had warned her about. Getting involved with Damien had only been the tip of the iceberg, the _lure_. Eric watched her contemplatively, not saying a word.

"I'm in too deep," she said, sounding like she was on the verge of tears. "And if you knew everything that I'd done, you'd hate me too." She nodded, quite sure of herself. His eyebrows furrowed in worry and concern.

"Jenny, there's nothing—"

"Stop, Eric! Just stop!" she almost stopped breathing. It was the second time that day that she'd nearly screamed at someone to stop talking, stop trying to tell her that she was in the wrong, or maybe that she was in the right. She shook her head slowly and sighed shakily.

"Okay, maybe I can't tell you it'll be alright," he shrugged. Her eyes slowly lifted up to his.

"If you've come to insult me or tell me I'm worthless, or even to banish me to the ends of the earth, don't bother. I've already gotten my fair share of that today."

Eric was now extremely concerned. "Jenny…" he reached out for her hand, but she stole it away, tucking it under her leg. He was suddenly very afraid to leave her, afraid of what she might do. Something inside him was plunged with a dagger when he saw a distant tear travel down the side of her face, smearing her mascara a bit.

"J-just g-go," she managed, the tears seeping into her voice. His eyes were wide with what must've been consuming her. It was obvious she wasn't going to tell him. He'd recently found out about the drug dealer, and though Serena and he hadn't really talked much lately, he had been mildly aware of Jenny meddling in Serena's relationship with Nate. Something _else_ had happened though, something _recent_, and maybe other things too.

But she wasn't going to tell him, at least not tonight. He didn't like that, but he accepted it. He just hoped he would tell her eventually.

"We all love you, Jenny," he said softly, though certain strength strode forth in his voice, like he needed to convince her of it. She had to restrain herself from scoffing or rolling her eyes. Such things were easy to say when you didn't know the truth. He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and then pulled her into a sweet side hug. He was relieved when she didn't push him away. She was tense because he didn't know, and he was well aware of that fact.

"And we're all going to _miss_ you…" he said slowly, playfully. She sighed, and he didn't know what to do with it. She could think of a few people who wouldn't be so distraught to see her go.

"I don't want Nate and Serena to be there when I go," she said abruptly. His brows furrowed.

"Jenny—"

"I don't," she said, her voice demanding as she turned very directly in his arms. "Please, Eric," she softened. He looked at her, trying to find the answers to the questions she wouldn't answer. Finally he nodded.

"Alright."

She nodded once and relaxed back in his arms again. That one piece of news brought her contentment, if only a little. Of course she didn't know if Eric would be able to follow through. There was only so much a human could do. After all, Chuck hadn't been able to save his hotel without sacrificing something precious – he'd confided to her the night before.

"Thanks, Eric," she said very quietly. He didn't know what else to say, so he just held her, rocked her a little until she was almost asleep. Several times she wanted to push him away, even tell him her other secrets so he'd finally know it all and then predictably she'd lose another person close to her, someone else she couldn't bear to be without. Somehow though, she convinced herself that Eric was different, that somehow he'd understand, and that was what kept her from finally pushing him away while she still had strength left. Still, she didn't tell him. The doubt ever loomed over her.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed. =) Wow, this was SUCH a long chapter. XD hahaha. But I really got swept up in that first scene, lololol. Please review. ;D I'll _try_ to update again tomorrow. =)


	4. Believe the Lie's a Truth

A/N: I am _so_ tired. Long day celebrating Mother's Day…*yawn* btw, Happy Mother's Day to y'all! Spread the news! Lol. Anyhow, you guys are amazing with your reviews. I can't believe I've gotten so many. It's like…ridiculous. Lol. So, yes, I'm squeezing out a chapter tonight. It'll only be two scenes anyways. ;p

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**Ch.4—Believe the Lie's a Truth**

"Blair."

She sighed, exhausted from the day's activities. She'd gotten worn out by dramatic events before, but this just seemed to be the worst of anything she'd ever felt before. She had gone from hopeful to glowing to heartbroken to furious to bitchy, and then just…numb.

"What is it, Dan?" she managed, groaning into the phone. His eyebrows furrowed.

"Are you…alright?" he asked. The obvious answer was _no_, but he couldn't help that the question slipped out of his mouth. He did however keep a hold on his tongue asking _why_ she might be upset. That would be such a 'foot-in-the-mouth' action. He scolded himself for even contemplating it.

Silence remained on her end. His question was stupid to say the least, but she had no energy left in her to bitch at him. It had all been used on Jenny Humphrey. Beside that fact, was that he was able to relate to her now and he had been with her every step of the way. She owed him at least a conversation after their long stressful day.

"I didn't really talk with Jenny…" he began again when there was no effort whatsoever on her end to continue this awkward conversation he'd initiated. "…about what we're doing…" he continued lamely. "What _are_ we doing?" he asked, sounding extremely confused. Blair rolled her eyes.

"We're getting her out of the city," she said dryly, lazily twisting some of her brunette locks around her forefinger. She was draped over her vanity, completely unaware of the mirror reflecting her fragile, tired appearance.

"By means of?" he asked, sounding almost demanding. She sighed again – not annoyed, but definitely too tired to think too clearly and explain the exact plan/scheme she had cleverly put together.

"Boarding school?" she offered up, that being the only clear answer she could think of at that moment. Serena had punished herself by becoming part of another world, only coming back when she realized the world she'd left actually wanted her and that she needed to own up to her misdeeds and fears. Blair believed Jenny needed to be punished. The fact that she had not run off immediately after waking up in Chuck's suite instituted the fact in Blair's head that she needed to be run out of town by none other than herself. Maybe she was acting rashly, but she didn't know how she was going to deal with Chuck, or if she even was going to deal with him at all. She had to send her flying emotions in some sort of direction.

"Well, yes, but…" he sighed again, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose. "She is still my sister, and I care about her. She's gone way off the deep end, Blair. I don't think you really understand the extent of the situation."

Now Blair was annoyed. Maybe she didn't understand, but she didn't want to. She felt so wronged by Chuck, and so completely heartbroken, all over again. She didn't want to think about that either. She was just so tired from the day's events, from their _relationship_, but her heart was tugging at her to not give it up. She hated the constant struggle.

"Dan…" she groaned. He didn't stop to address her feelings or the fact that she might have been exhausted or previous to the phone call been crying from heartbreak. He just needed to vent, and she was the only other person so directly involved.

"While we were out walking this morning, Nate texted me. I didn't tell you, because you had just started talking about Chuck and I didn't want to put another burden on y—"

"What are you trying to say?" she asked, suddenly snapping to attention. Some sort of dread started to develop in her stomach, but the curiosity and _need_ to know what he knew that she so obviously didn't, was overwhelming. The warnings going off in her head were completely ignored.

He paused, seriously wondering if he should take this leap into the unknown. Blair had suffered enough, and she was also known to overreact. But he couldn't stop himself.

"When I said that Jenny had been trying to steal Nate away from Serena, I don't think you understood the extent of it."

Blair blinked, definitely interested but confused as well. "What do you mean?" she asked.

"I mean…" he ran a hand over his face, feeling overwhelmed by the fact that he was actually sharing the information that had just been brought to his attention. "She didn't _stop_ trying to steal him." Blair's lips parted, wondering where this was leading to. "She's _completely_ gone off the deep end, just to get him." Her eyebrows furrowed.

"Dan, what did she do?" she asked directly, her voice lowering dangerously. He sighed, very uneasy now. "_Dan_," she pressed.

"She…" he pinched the bridge of his nose again, "she almost overdosed," he said, slightly relieved that he had actually come out with it. "And then…she used her fragile state to lure Nate in." He paused, taking the time to make the decision of whether to tell Blair the whole truth. He decided on _yes_. "Apparently earlier this year, she got into some trouble and Nate brought her out of it. She developed a crush and then even when he turned her down, she wouldn't give up…" he shook his head. "A few days ago, she showed up at Chuck's suite, saying she needed a place to stay. I guess Chuck must have thought her failed attempts to get Nate had made her give up and so he allowed it. After all, he allowed Serena to stay with him for awhile while she was having…problems at home." He shrugged, growing more overwhelmed by the second, and hoping Blair wasn't completely breaking under the weight of the newly revealed factors. "Obviously, she was still trying to woo Nate. I'm sure Chuck wasn't aware of it though. Maybe…she switched her target to Chuck to get back at you for sending the blast to Gossip Girl about her drug dealings earlier in the year. You were responsible for that, right?"

She blinked. Her mind was quickly becoming blank, running ramped with all the information that had been bestowed upon her and the connections she was starting to make with all that she already knew.

"Y-yes," she managed.

He didn't stop to analyze how she was speaking. He hoped she wasn't breaking, but he had gotten too far into his confession to pull away now. He _needed_ to tell her everything.

"Well, Nate kind of confessed to me via multiple texts that over the last few days she has done everything in her will power to seduce him. From skanky outfits to alluring words and gestures, she was not subtle in the least. And, from what I understand, Chuck was supporting the act initially."

Blair raised her eyebrows at that last statement.

"Another reason why Nate is keeping his distance, I'm guessing," he said.

Blair blinked rapidly, trying to comprehend all of what he was saying. "What else?" she asked, a little frantic.

"I think Georgina might be involved…" he said, sounding very unsure of himself, or maybe what she was hearing was just absolute dread.

"Why would you think that?" she asked, a mix of anger and confusion starting to form within her. She couldn't understand why she'd be mad when she could hardly accept all that he was throwing at her. She just couldn't…_think_ straight.

"She was the one that got Damien sent into the city."

Her breath was stolen away, and she was quiet for an eerily long time.

"Blair?" he asked gently.

"What else?" she asked, her gut now feeling particularly queasy. Something extremely powerful told her there was still one last final detail he hadn't gotten to.

"I…I'm the one that sent the blast today."

She was quiet, her mind exploding with anger but without enough strength to really spew it out in any particular direction or even any specific person, despite the fact that the cause of her mad state was only a breath away.

"You _knew_," she breathed, wishing it had come out harshly instead of broken. "You knew, and you didn't tell me. You didn't tell me _anything_. You just sent the details of my tragic love life straight to Gossip Girl, where _everyone_ would find out about it."

He sucked in a breath. "Blair—"

Dial tone.

………………………………………………………

**Really, really sorry about everything.**

** -J**

DELETE.

Chuck was a mess. He knew he shouldn't, but he absolutely despised Jenny Humphrey. She might have 'needed' someone the night before, but she ruined everything. He was just so _damn_ convinced Blair didn't love him anymore.

"Blair…please talk to me," he begged, hating the silence that her answering machine offered. "Answer your phone," he ran a hand through his hair frustratingly, hating himself, and just hoping beyond all hope that she'd give him another undeserved chance. "_Please_, Blair, I'll do anything. _Anything_. I really screwed up. I—"

The silence was cut off, but not by Blair. The answering machine had decided once again that he had been talking too long. It was like Dorota preventing him from climbing up the stairs to speak with Blair in her bedroom.

He groaned at the sound of his phone dying. The beeping was annoying and it most definitely did not signal a phone call or text from Blair. Jenny had texted him too many times that night. He felt guilty at first when he deleted her troubled message, but the more she sent, the less guilty he felt. It was almost as if she was _trying_ to make the situation worse, even if she wasn't. He, on the other hand, had been calling Blair every spare second that his phone had not been beeping at him with another desperate message from Jenny.

Thirty-two times he'd tried to call Blair. And thirty-two times she hadn't picked up. He liked to pretend she was just busy or her phone was turned off, but he knew better. Living in his mind did not have its advantages anymore. It was worth it when he'd taken Blair's virginity and convincing himself she was into him eventually got him in her pants and in her heart. Now the task was not achieved so easily.

One time he'd gotten really excited when his phone had gone off and it hadn't been from Jenny. The ringtone was not familiar at all, but he hardly registered it in the moment. He would have been jumping up and down if his hands had not acted so quickly in picking up the phone and answering. It was extremely disappointing when it had ended up being a wrong number.

"Blair…" he sighed into the phone, not hanging up until the answering machine cut him off again, but he didn't say anything else. There was no doubt in his mind that half the reason he continued to call her was so he could hear her sweetly almost-singing voice on the answering machine. That voice contained all that was vixen–Blair Waldorf, the one that had blocked him out once again for the non-cheating but still unforgivable act he'd committed.

The Chuck from a year ago would've been taunting 'I told you so' if he'd been there. A year ago, he'd convinced himself that he wasn't good enough for her and _that's_ why they couldn't be together, because he'd screw her over and never be able to forgive himself for it. His 'maybe in the future' line was only said so she wouldn't pity him or try to convince him otherwise, at the time. He'd told her sooner or later _they'd_ screw it up, but he'd only ever meant the words for _himself_. There was no way he would blame her for messing up a romantic relationship with the infamous _Chuck Bass_. She was _perfect_. Now that he had done the most horrendous acts, it almost amused him how fiercely he was fighting for her, refusing this was the end of them.

33…34…35….50…80…100…

Somehow her answering machine still allowed for him to continue his messages. He wondered if it was because she was deleting them. That sparked a little hope in him, because maybe it meant that she was listening to them too.

**REALLY sorry.**

** -J**

He growled, literally hating her for her persistence. Maybe she was insecure and needed reassurance but he just could not sympathize with her or for her anymore. He felt like a complete ass to both of them, but the extremely high risk of losing Blair forever…

_"If you don't come, I'll close my heart to you forever."_

…was too scary.

**Stop texting.**

** -C**

His phone rang.

"_Stop_," he growled. The dial tone rang clear in his ears and he hung up. For a moment he panicked at the possibility that it could have been Blair that had called and not Jenny, but one lingering look at the name that had flashed across the screen – **JENNY** – relieved his sudden panic. He was not cheerful about his cold way of blocking her out, but he definitely felt justified in light of the situation.

The phone didn't ring after that. It didn't buzz or beep with a text message. He didn't sleep for at least the next couple hours. He drank alcohol till he couldn't see straight, and he called Blair. He called her over and over and over. And then he'd take a two-minute break to go to the bathroom. When he'd come out, he'd call her again. The next time he took the phone in with him. He pretended that maybe she was there with him.

_"Chuck…" her voice murmured, her smile pressing against the side of his neck. He smirked in response and the butterflies inside him instantly fluttered at the feel of her warm hands wrapped around his waist._

_ When he turned around, she was gone, and he felt cold. A chilly breeze slid past him in replacement of her warm hands. He felt so empty…and alone._

Even in his mind, his experiences with Blair ended badly. She always disappeared. He thought, if this truly was the end, that he'd at least have his memories with her to play over and over in his head. Even those it seemed had been blocked out in parts.

"Blair…" he murmured, his head banging against the wall as he slid down to the base of it. "…come back to me." His eyes closed and the painful nightmares pulled him into sleep. He would wake up sweaty and petrified in the middle of the night when he dreamed they had never been… _at_ _all_.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed. =) Short and kinda filler, but I at least updated. Maybe more tomorrow, I'm not sure. 3x21 is supposed to be a great episode and I plan on the next chapter being a long one, so…we'll just see how it goes. Besides, tomorrow's the only day this week I don't have finals, and I haven't even begun to study. Review! ;)


	5. Only Human

A/N: Well, I officially don't think CJ are going to sleep together at all anymore. XD So much for this story. Lol. I mean, of course there are still those lingering doubts, but I honestly think if they do anything, it'll just be a kiss blowed out of proportion later on. I mean, CB proposal? How can you go wrong? Lol. I honestly think that CB are going to be okay at the end of the episode, even if they aren't engaged (which they probably won't be, I'm guessing -lol) or entirely together like before…they will be soon, and I feel like that's the worst case scenario. Haha. I think they'll be just fine and that CJ promo was just freaking us out to get us all hyped up for the season finale. XD Anyways, I've been trying to incorporate as many spoilers in this fic as possible, and now it probably won't go up in flames. Haha. Oh well, I shall still finish the story. Lol. Just in case. ;) Sorry for not updating yesterday, but I update DaP, so I think that should count for something. Lol.

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**Ch.5—Only Human**

She didn't hear him when he came in, but she felt his presence and that was almost worse.

"Go away, Chuck."

"I came to apologize."

Her eyes flitted to him from where she had been flipping through some magazine on her bed. He looked worn out – tired, dark circles under eyes that were almost red. His hair was a mess and his tie was too loose. Too many buttons were undone on his shirt. She raised her eyebrows.

"Well, don't you look presentable." She leaned back on her hands propped up behind her. Chuck took a few more steps into the room and closed the door.

"No need to close the door, Chuck. I don't plan on sleeping with you," she said, amused. He was confused by her lighthearted mood but decided not to comment on it. He knew all too well how to pretend and put up the perfect façade when you were the most broken. Still, he ignored her comment and walked further into the room. She glanced at the closed door and then back to him. The magazine still lay open on her lap but she kept her eyes pinned to his form as he stood dazed in the middle of her bedroom.

"I came to apologize," he repeated, maybe as a mantra to himself. He nodded once after that, and she knew for sure he was trying to convince herself more than her. She was amused. For her part, she was not taking his arrival or set goals seriously at all. The day before had been exhausting and she just needed a day to _pretend_.

"You said that," she commented, smirk on her face. He turned to her from his stance by her window. He did not look amused or willing to play into her little game in the least. In fact, he looked dead serious about being there and discussing the prior day's events. She tried to ignore the sickening feeling in her stomach at that realization.

Chuck took a step towards her. "I really thought you weren't coming," he said. He sounded choked up, so weak and vulnerable and just _needing_ her. Blair fought extremely hard to not fall under his spell. She sat up straight and cleared her throat.

"You said that too. Yesterday."

He nodded solemnly. "I really didn't though."

She sighed, exhausted from the conversation already. It was obvious now that she couldn't play off his coming to her as some sort of joke, but continuing on like it was didn't really achieve anything either.

"Chuck, why are you here?" she ran a hand through her air and briefly held her face in it. She had been so energized before he had come over. Her mindset hadn't officially shifted back over to the anguish that was the day before, but she remembered the facts even if she wasn't going to allow herself to be too emotionally involved currently.

"I came to—"

"Apologize, right," she rolled her eyes and scooted off her bed. She stood to her feet and looked at him, but would not dare make the move towards him. "Well, you've done that, _twice_ actually. So, what are you _still_ doing here?" she asked, raising her eyebrows and leaning forward a little. She crossed her arms across her chest.

His breath caught in his throat. When he'd woken up that morning convinced he was going to go win her back, he hadn't really thought past an apology. That had happened before.

_"Give me a reason."_

"We can make this work," he said, his eyes suddenly focusing on her. He wasn't losing touch with reality or unsure of why he was truly there. He wasn't grappling around for words or high on drugs. Blair suddenly saw in him confidence and certainty. She didn't know how she felt about that. A shiver went up her spine.

"That's not a reason," she said. His eyes pierced into hers and he stepped towards her.

"I came here because I'm not living without you." She raised her eyebrows, looking amused again. "I'm not living without _us_," he amended. Her fingers clenched around her elbows. She said nothing, just stared at him, her anger starting to boil. She felt so very vulnerable and just wanted to give into him, just like she'd wanted to do for weeks every time she saw him and temporarily convinced herself that they weren't broken up and she was just avoiding him for something silly.

"Blair…?" he asked when the silence was unbearable. Her eyebrows furrowed and her lips pursed tight. He thought he saw tears in her eyes, but he was too aware of the anger seeping onto her face to confirm anything that might reflect sadness.

"What do you want from me, Chuck?" He heard a sniffle. "Just to take you back like nothing happened? Like what happened with Jenny never happened?" She wanted to be fuming, but the feel of liquid almost spilling out of her eyes left her denial of tears quite faulty.

He looked into her eyes still deeper, almost as if he were looking into her soul. "No," he said. She blinked, confused. _What?_ was left unsaid. "It's a part of our story and I—"

She fumed, grumbled fiercely at his words and turned away, walking to the far side of her room. "Don't tell me that, Chuck. Just _don't_." She turned around in her fury only to see he heartbroken face still persistent as ever and pleading with her from the other side of the room. She walked towards him and her voice became soft and quiet. "Don't tell me this is just something we have to get through. Don't sound like a cheesy love song or some overpaid psychiatrist. Don't feed me lines that don't mean anything. Just…" her breath caught in her throat, "just _don't_." She swallowed hard.

He nodded slowly and cupped her face in his hand. Much to his surprise, she did not recoil or physically abuse him in any way. "Promise me something?" he requested. She nodded, lost in his eyes. It didn't feel like they were on the edge of losing each other forever. It felt less…_life-threatening_. She didn't want that hope to fade away.

"Promise me," he tucked a curl behind her ear. She closed her eyes at the gentle touch. "You won't let go of us." Her eyes open. They didn't snap and she didn't push him away. She didn't yell or scream or tell him she didn't love him. That was yesterday. She wouldn't give him such emotion today. But she did step away from him, as reluctantly as it might have been, and looked him sadly in the eyes.

"You already did," she said quietly. Then she looked away from him and left her room, leaving the door opened behind her.

……………………………………………………………………

He spotted her from down below, awkwardly bidding her family farewell. He figured it was going to be bad for because of what they'd done, but he'd never imagined in a million years that Blair would send her out of the state. He noticed with curiosity that Nate and Serena were not present at the farewell. For a moment, Jenny caught his eye but he immediately looked away. There would be no _them_, no _Chuck_ and _Jenny_. They both knew it. Neither wanted _that_ kind of relationship, but deep inside each of them they wanted _some_ sort of relationship. It would be too cold for Chuck to just be fine with nothing between them. But it was certainly a sacrifice he was willing to make if it meant getting Blair back.

"What's the big family gathering for?"

The familiar voice jolted his senses but he only smoothly turned to look at who had sidled up beside him. Her hair was a lot longer and blonder than he'd ever seen but there was no mistaking the mischievous glint in her eyes and scheming quirk in her lips.

"Georgina."

She smiled up at him. "Thought you'd gotten rid of me?" she raised her eyebrows. He shook his head.

"No one can get rid of you. Blair just temporarily displaced you."

"Ah," she nodded, smiling. "So you had nothing to do with it?" she raised an eyebrow. He just smiled at her and eventually she looked away, back to the scene of Humphreys and some Van der Woodsens bidding farewell.

"Alright, keep your secrets. But you still haven't answered my other question?"

"Which would be what?" he asked, not sure if he was really annoyed at her or himself. Part of him was curious, though maybe he was just amused. He didn't particularly know what he was feeling. But he wasn't going to analyze it further. "Jenny's leaving for boarding school."

Georgina smirked, her lips slightly pursed. "Perfect."

Chuck's eyebrows fused. "Perfect," he repeated, his tone neutral. Then he turned his face to her. "And what does that mean?" She turned to look at him, clever smile still on her face.

"It means you got played by Jenny Humphrey…" she paused, enjoying the rapid emotions that sped across his face. She would relish it as long as possible. "…and me," she smiled brightly.

"Meaning…?"

"Oh, look at the time," she looked up at the clock on the far side of the train station. "It seems I must leave." She plastered a fake smile on her face and started to walk away, predicting down to the second when he'd pull her back. It happened as planned.

"Yes, Bass?" she asked innocently. His brows were narrowed as he stared her down. "I didn't think you were usually so rough with the ladies," she chirped cheerfully. His eyes were unmoving. She shrugged. "At least not out in the open."

"Georgina."

"Mmm?"

"What the _hell_ are you up to?" he growled. A smirk slid onto her face and slowly developed into a smile. She watched him glaring at her, saw the hidden pain and need he had to find out her answers. He had suffered too much lately, she gathered.

"Wouldn't you like to know…" she mused, still smiling. She eyed his form up and down.

"Good lord, I hope you don't plan on sleeping with me as a…trade," the words sounded evil on his tongue but he still spoke them. He was disgusted and there wasn't much more that could be wrong.

She scoffed. "No," she said quite pointedly. "Did that once, not planning on doing it again, not even for revenge. Besides," she shrugged, "I like to get others to do my dirty work."

His eyes narrowed in on her. He was beyond confused but it didn't look like she was going to be spilling anything too soon. "You're not going to tell me," he stated. She looked at him innocently.

"You know me too well, Bass."

He blinked.

"Of course, not nearly well enough," she slipped her purse higher up her shoulder. "Otherwise you'd know at least the venue in which I am making all your despicable lives worth not living."

He shook his head at her, lost at what she'd need to take revenge on, and why she wouldn't just tell him if all her pieces seemed to be in place. She sighed, annoyed at his stupidity, and walked away. He was jolted. He didn't understand it, why he didn't just run after her and demand she tell him the truth. It did not appear as if he'd get much more the second time than he did the first. Perhaps that was what kept his feet glued to the floor.

His gaze moved slowly throughout the room, looking for some sort of clue that would lead him to believe why Georgina was there to begin with. She had clearly come from somewhere, maybe to where Blair had sent her to, but that didn't explain why she had come to him and left with numerous loose ends. He felt heat come to him then and he looked down below. A curious looking Dan Humphrey was staring at him. Chuck's eyebrows furrowed, and then he noticed how Jenny had just passed the entrance to where the trains lay, Georgina Sparks by her side.

He looked back to Dan. The pre-Brooklynite didn't look angry in the least. His eyes looked searching, confused, and perhaps…regretful? Chuck did not take another second to think about it. If he wasn't on Nate and Serena's hit-list, he would be soon. He turned away from the overwhelmingly mysterious and confusing scene and left the train station. He had to find some way to get Blair back, no matter how hard it would be or how long it'd take. He was determined to.

Then, it hit him.

_Grudges_.

Georgina Sparks holds grudges…and she never lets go. She had just now led Jenny out of the train station, and she'd taunted _him_ about something she knew that he didn't – something she'd done or was doing that he obviously would not be fond of. _Oh God. Blair._ She had something to do with Jenny…and Blair.

……………………………………………………………….

Vanessa had left on a plane right after Jenny departed on her train. Two of the closest people in his life just left. Whatever the reasons might have been, it still did not feel justified in his heart. He didn't know what he was thinking when he got involved with Blair's schemes or when he loved Vanessa enough to let her go, but now he was paying for it. Four beers ago it was a lot worse. Now it was very slowly starting to numb.

That was how she found him.

She wasn't pleased at what he'd done to her, hadn't been pleased with what was going on in her life period the last two days – and if she was being honest with herself, ever since Jack had shown back up in New York. Somehow though she'd gotten word that Dan had gone out drinking. With Nate and Serena fighting and she needing a few good drinks herself, she thought she'd go hunt down the lonely boy and bring him back home.

"Dan…" she started, sitting down in the stool next to him. He turned his head to look at her, his eyes hazy. She cleared her throat and pulled away his beer, signaling for the bartender to send her a drink – a _small_ one.

Dan watched as her hand enclosed around the large glass and pulled it away. He found himself being slightly irritated and a _heeeeeeey!_ sounded off inside him but it never made it past his throat. He just followed her movements and finally looked up into her face, but only after she'd gotten her drink and brought it to her lips. It seemed he could not focus on very much.

Blair sighed and looked at him. "What are you doing here, Humphrey?" she asked, her fingers still grasping to the rim of her glass.

"Dying," he managed, turning his head to look at where his glass of beer had been. He frowned. Blair rolled her eyes.

"You shouldn't be drinking." He looked at her. "Not like this, not so much. You don't have a tolerance level built up like Chuck does," she said the last part jokingly. He looked over to her, and slight recognition seemed to make him focus a little on the reality around him.

"Chuck," he said blankly. Blair closed her eyes in recognition as well.

"Yes," she said. She was going to expand on her point and tell him about how Chuck had practically been drinking scotch since he suckled from a bottle as an infant. The lighthearted tone was almost inappropriate though, and the continued subject matter of _Chuck_ did not seem safe ground for either of them.

"He loves you," Dan sighed loudly. Blair closed her eyes again. "Jenny's gone…"

_Oh_.

"Vanessa left too…" he continued to ramble. "Some CNN job in Haiti this summer…" he sighed loudly again. _Oh._ Blair continued to be in shock. "Oh!" he nearly shouted suddenly and turned back to her. "I'm sorry….about…before."

She shook her head and smiled ever so briefly at him. "Don't worry about it, Dan. You've had a rough day." His eyebrows furrowed and he blinked at her in confusion.

"You're not mad at me?" he asked, almost positive that his vision had gotten blurry and there was two of her.

"Oh no, I'm pissed," she assured him. "But if I take it out on you while you're drunk, you'll never remember." She smiled cheerily and reached for her drink, taking another sip. He analyzed her, how she drank, the tone in which she spoke, and the way her legs crossed over each other as they hung off of the bar stool. Her legs were exquisitely long and the light in the room glinted off of them. Her skirt rode a little high up her things, and her hair curled sweetly around the frame of her face.

"Blair…" he started reaching for her.

"What? Oh no," she shook her head and laughed at him, pushing him away as he reached for her waist. She didn't fear him assaulting her so much as she disapproved of it. She wasn't disgusted like she once would have been, but she was not going to sleep with Dan simply because he was lonely and feeling broken.

_Broken._

She gasped.

"Blair…" he reached out for her again. She was so deep in her thoughts she didn't realize how close his lips got to her face. She moved out of the way just in time and he fell into her lap. She sighed, a bit aggravated and pushed him up so his face was resting on the bar counter. She quickly wrote down his address on a slip of paper and handed it to the bartender.

"Call a cab for him and make sure he gets _in it_ with this address. I'm supposed to be taking him home, and I've recently decided that is the _last_ thing I want to do." The bartender raised his eyebrows at her. He hadn't seen anything too scandalous or threatening happening between the brunettes, but with one glare from Blair Waldorf he nodded politely and did as he was told.

Once out on the street, Blair felt little droplets of water hit her face. It was sprinkling and instantly she worried for the sanity of her hair, but it passed relatively soon, as her mind fell into the winding back and replay of her most recent experience with Dan Humphrey.

He had felt _broken_ and _alone_ and without a hope in the world, at least not one that he could see. He had been drunk and she had just…_been there_. An uneasy chill ran up her spine. _Just like Chuck and Jenny. _It was different though, she told herself. Chuck was holding himself open to her again. It wasn't just another lay, because their relationship was hanging out in the open. Their break-up was in question. But…he hadn't cheated. Dan would have cheated if Blair had just let him. But she hadn't been broken, had hardly consumed herself with such awful emotions all day. She'd just spent the day thinking about _Chuck_, about _them_, or at least what they _used_ to be. _Would she have just given in if she had been as broken as he was? _

It wouldn't have meant anything, but_…would she? Just so she didn't feel alone?_

Before she could think about the possibility further and what the answer truly was for her, of which possibility was greater despite what she wanted to believe, the sprinkles turned into a pouring rain and she shrieked at the realization. There were no looming roofs down the street going either way, and nearly every place was closed. She didn't want to go back to the bar where Dan might possibly be. She just didn't want to _be there_.

That was when a limo pulled up along the side of the street, and quite surprisingly Chuck rolled down the window. She just stood there, frozen, getting soaked.

"Come on, Blair," he said when five seconds past as she didn't so much as speak or move. He sighed, wondering if she was hesitating because of what he might say or do to her or where he'd take her once she got inside. He breathed in and out slowly, just watching her. When she still didn't move, he opened the door, getting drenched himself and walked over to her. He brought her to the limo. She hadn't been resistant like he thought she'd be.

"Let me take you home," he whispered against her and pressed a kiss to her head.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

A/N: So, this chapter sucks. I am sorry for that. I'm just so positive about the season finale now, and that is making it a bit difficult to write good angst. *shrug* This fic's almost over though, so hopefully you can hold out for a little longer. XD Thanks for all the review. ;p *love*


	6. Meaning Beyond Memories

A/N: Well, I was freaking out to no end before the finale, especially since I learned everything that was going to happen about four hours before it aired – talk about painful waiting – but it actually wasn't that bad (the episode I mean, not the waiting. That was torture. Lol). In fact, I found the finale absolutely phenomenal. It's definitely not the end of CB. They're totally going to use Chuck getting shot & almost dying as a means of Chuck getting back into Blair's life. Plus, the confrontation scene wasn't nearly as bad as they made it out to be in the UK promo and though I felt bad for Blair, I really felt the worst for Chuck. How awful. Poor bb. *tear* Their reunion and his almost proposal were freaking amazing. I have no doubt that they'll be together soon. As always, I overestimated the horror aspect of the episode. It was great and I definitely won't be depressed this summer, except for the fact that I have to wait 3 months for more episodes. Heheh. DS was love too, but I won't go into further detail of what I thought of the episode…that's what my profile is for. Lol. Read on! Sorry it took so long, but I was without internet and finishing up school and I was waiting to get at least 10 reviews for the chapter. I've decided that is a prerequisite for more chapters in this fic. Heh. Only 1 more chapter after this one. Hope you've enjoyed it. Thank goodness most of the angst is over. My peppiness over the episode is making it difficult to get into that depressive zone. I'm pretty proud of myself for being able to stomach CJ in the episode. A few sickening moments to get to CB epicness – even if it wasn't always happy – is kinda worth it, maybe. =) Oh, and as a final side note: forget the NSD drama. As I said, I'm not going to go off into other SLs, even if there are hints of them. ;p

*Preview for possible new fic at the end of the chapter.

*I own nothing.

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**Ch.6—Meaning Beyond Memories**

Her eyes fluttered open when she felt the stream of warm light cover parts of her face. Scanned the room, trying to determine where she was and what had happened the night before. It came back to her in fast flashes. Dan had tried to kiss her. She'd left. Chuck had taken her home.

_Chuck! _

She snapped up and realized for the first time that she was in her own bed, in her own room, totally and completely alone.

"Hello?" she called out, just in case she was wrong. But she wasn't. Nobody answered. She sighed and flipped over the covers, climbing out of bed. She stumbled into the bathroom and realized she was wearing the same clothes she had been the night before, minus her shoes. A wave of awe and a slight speed-up in her heart rate hit her in an instant. Chuck had taken her home, hadn't undressed her, and had left. It made her feel a little bubbly inside. She had to fight to remind herself what a horrible person he'd been during the last month.

_"…if you don't come, then I'll close my heart to you forever."_

It would be easier she decided, if she took a shower and forgot the night before ever happened, or maybe the whole week. Perhaps it would have just been best to get rid of the last two years of her life. She shuddered, not wanting to go to that place – that place _before Chuck_. She remembered how she had just brushed past him sleeping with Vanessa. It should have been infuriating, but somehow she had just put it in the pile of everything else gone wrong. The call girl he had become fascinated with should have irked her too, but it just seemed like _typical Chuck_, and having a one-night stand with Carter – his sworn enemy – was the perfect solution, even before she knew it would be. The blow out this time was the worst though, not because it was a one-night stand, but because it was with _Jenny Humphrey_ and because she had decided to be with him again. Even now her heart ached that she couldn't just be with him. It was right where she wanted to be, even if she wouldn't let herself admit to it.

She couldn't remember exactly what had happened after Chuck had guided her to his limo. But she did remember how paralyzed she had felt in the pouring rain and the fact that he came out into the madness to save her from the onslaught of a possible cold, felt to her just like how the knights in her fairytales saved their destined princess. That had been significant to her somehow, him saving her. He had done it so many times and she didn't want that to matter anymore. She wanted it to mean _nothing_ after what he'd done.

But while she showered, she couldn't stop thinking about him, about what he could do to her, in every sense of the word. She thought about their relationship and what a big jumbled mess it was. But the good times shone all the brighter in her mind. They were beautiful and clinging to her for dear life, hoping she didn't forget them for good and move on. She couldn't if she tried, she realized. That or if she encountered some physical accident scarring her brain enough to make her forget.

Her phone rang when she stepped out of the shower. She quickly wrapped a towel around her hair and placed a robe around her waist. Then she treaded towards where the sound was coming from. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw Chuck's abandoned coat beneath her cell phone. Her eyes shut in anguish. Her heart throbbed painfully and she wanted to break her phone in half when she saw who was calling her.

Cameron.

_Asshole_. She sighed, ignoring the call instantly. She supposed she should be fair though. Cameron was a far more decent choice than Marcus had been. He was a nice guy too and she _was_ genuinely interested in him, even if it was just to move on from Chuck. But that was just it. He _wasn't_ Chuck, and she didn't want anyone else. Her heart wouldn't _let_ _her_ want anyone else.

She moved back to her bathroom and continued to freshen up for the day. She didn't know what it held, but she was determined to make Chuck her first destination. Her mind was screaming at her to send him a simple _thank-you_ text and move on with her life. He had hurt her in so many ways and after what he'd done with Jenny, he didn't deserve forgiveness. But she couldn't blame him for anything _but_ Jenny because she'd already forgiven him for all the other things. She'd already accepted his apologies and realized beyond a shadow of a doubt that they were meant to be and that they weren't twisted and that they could work through anything.

_Anything_.

She loved him more than she wanted to admit.

_"I love you so much…it consumes me."_

But Jenny had messed with everybody. _Everybody_. She'd done more damage than should be allowed in a lifetime. And he'd slept with her. He'd slept with the one girl she simply could no longer stand. After she'd realized she simply could not live without him, and needed to be with him, he'd gone and done _that_. Her insides screamed at her, demanding she pick a side, demanding she choose something and that she'd stick to it.

Dan's actions swarmed in and all around her. Surely, he had not been as far gone as Chuck and Jenny had been, thinking it was the end of the world and everyone hated them, that there was no such thing as true happiness because they were a disease infecting the world.

_"I thought you didn't love me anymore!"_

She shuddered at the words that had only made her furious at the time. Now she found herself falling into some out-of-the-blue sympathy. It was unbelievable. Understanding had swept through her, and though his actions with Jenny were unacceptable, everything he'd done since then hadn't been. Except the fact that he had lied to her. That made her blood boil. All of this just made her want to scream.

"I have to call Chuck," she told herself out loud. "I have to call him and go to him and somehow…" she couldn't finish her sentence. But, with one final blow from her hair dryer, she pinned up her hair part way and nearly ran to where her phone lie atop Chuck's coat. She picked up the device but then found herself dropping it and gathering the dormant coat against her chest. It smelled of him and she yearned for the source of its intoxicating scent.

"Chuck," she said, trying to sound professional. It was his answering machine. "I'm coming over. Right now. I-I hope you're there." She snapped the phone shut, wondering if her message had been too…odd. She decided not to think about it. She needed to talk to him, and as long as he wasn't screwing another manipulative mistake, she knew she wouldn't regret it.

………………………………………………………………………

The elevator doors slid open, resounding with a _ding!_ She found him unmoved, staring at a week-old newspaper, sitting on the couch. She was surprised he hadn't heard her come in, especially since she was so close to him now, not more than five feet away.

"Chuck?" she asked, halting her steps. He turned his head and looked up to her. His eyes widened and he gaped. He tried to conceal it a moment later and just look at her calmly, as if it was the most common exchange in the world, but he could not make himself do it to completion. And she was far too enamored to forget the look on him face.

"Blair," he said, a bit breathlessly. He swung his legs around to the floor and turned towards her. "What…uh…what are you doing here?" he asked. It didn't come off cold, he didn't think anyways. But he was sure the sound of her voice had been imaginary. After the havoc that had been the two prior days, he hardly thought she'd seek him out of her own volition.

"I…wanted to thank you," she said slowly, walking towards him just a little bit more. He blinked and then his face fell a little, realization dawning.

"It was nothing," he said, shaking off the notion that the single act could lead back to him holding her in his arms. She walked closer to him though and demanded his attention.

"It was _not_ nothing, Chuck." She looked concerned, almost hurt when he looked up at her. He wanted to make the pain all go away, and almost set off into a full-flight of how little Jenny Humphrey meant to him, how much what they did meant nothing. But he held his tongue. Blair was in his suite and he would relish it as long as possible. Still, he shook his head in denial of his supposed heroic deed.

"It was pouring outside, and you couldn't have possibly known where I was," he looked guilty, but she ignored it. "You came out into the rain, got drenched in the process and took me home. I…I'm very grateful."

He nodded, smiled a little, but was definitely confused. Sure, it had been a nice deed he had done for her, but it hadn't justified or made up for anything that he'd done. She had been furious and unforgiving. Even when she was calm, she still was insistent on their separation. To come all the way to see him just to offer up her thanks for saving her from a cold seemed a little extreme. He analyzed her demeanor.

"What's this about, Blair?"

She blinked. "What?"

He stood to his feet and took a couple steps towards her. She did not back up. "You broke me off from your life for good, and now just because I save you from getting a cold because you couldn't think enough to get under cover you come all the way over and thank me face-to-face?"

She was a bit annoyed at him pointing out her stupidity and frozen state, but she forced the bubbling anger to cool down. He didn't know the whole story, she told herself. He didn't know what had happened with Dan and how it may have perhaps changed her thinking entirely. She decided to take another route.

"What were you going to say to me, Chuck?" she asked, moving past him to sit next to where he had been on the couch. "If I had made it to the Empire State Building, what would you have said to me? What would have happened?" she asked, sounding a bit naïve. Chuck gaped but then turned around to look at her.

"Why are you asking me this?" he asked a bit breathlessly. He would have thought it wouldn't have mattered what he was going to say. What was done was done and he simply could not see her forgiving him all because he gave her a ride home in the midst of a rainstorm. Her eyes flickered up to his.

"Just answer the question," she said lightly. He was still bothered by her lack of answers to his own question, but he went to sit next to her, feeling around in his jacket for the small velvet box he'd been well prepared to use had she come earlier that two days before. He cleared his throat and opened the box in front of her. Her eyes went wide at the sight of the sparkling diamond.

"I would have said that there was no excuse for the pain I'd caused you, and that I was sorry _again_ and very willing to make it up to you, even if it took me the rest of my life." He paused, relishing in her gaping reaction and slightly rosy cheeks. "I would have asked you to marry me, Blair."

She stared down at the perfect ring embedded in the perfect box, held in the hands of her lover and she swore she had lost the ability to breathe. Everything in her screamed to just take the damn thing and marry him right there. Her insides were still raging against her though. He had hurt her _so_ bad. Maybe his little romantic proposal would have worked _before_, but it would not work now. Still, she could not find it in herself to shoot to her feet and stomp out of there, to push him out of her life so sufficiently he'd never forget it. She ached to have that ring on her finger.

"I…I…"

He daringly did not let the moment slip by without a fierce kiss on her perfect supple lips. It caught her by surprise and she gasped, able to reel back. Her eyes looked at his and she tried to be angry but couldn't find it in herself.

"No," she shook her head. Tears filled her eyes. "No, I can't. Chuck, you can't _do_ this to me. I…" He looked so broken, but he slowly closed the box and slipped it back into his pocket. It hadn't even been an official proposal, but it still hit her to the bone. She felt as if it had, as if the boy who had hurt her more than she'd ever thought possible, had the balls to think she would so much as listen to his proposal. But she had. She'd asked for it and she could not blame that on him.

"I know," he nodded, accepting the fact. Silent, heated tension filled the room and Blair felt like she was going to explode. She thought that maybe it wouldn't be the best idea to just throw herself into his arms and kiss him like her life depended on it. But her resolve was quickly weakening. She decided to go for the truth. She backtracked a little and took a little side route.

"Dan tried to kiss me," she forced out. His eyes snapped to hers and they looked angry with revenge and jealousy. Her lips parted and eyes widened a bit at the reaction. Though her heart did swell a bit when she took note of how overprotective he was of her, even at the place they were now.

"He didn't succeed, but…that's why I was out in the rain, not moving," she chuckled lightly. "I was just a little shaken up."

Chuck nodded slowly but was still clearly angry at what Dan had tried to do. Blair laid a hand on his arm, and despite the atmosphere, felt sparks crackling through them. She had to catch her breath in order to recover. His expression did not seem to reflect her own, but somehow she pushed that failing hope aside.

"He wasn't very aggressive, Chuck. With Jenny and Vanessa gone, he was just lonely. But," she paused, hoping he would gather what direction she was going in with her next words, "he was nowhere near as depressed as you must've been the other night."

He looked at her very intensely and she wondered if his heart was beating as fast as hers was. She could hear her ramped breathing in her ears and wondered if he could hear it to. She wondered if she was sweating, couldn't force her eyes away from his. She swallowed hard and wanted so desperately to choke out that she loved him and she had forgiven him somehow and that they could be together, but it just wouldn't come out.

"What did you come here to tell me, Blair?" he asked, his voice low and dangerous. She swallowed her fear and her courage and her heart burst into flames. She tried to keep the tears at bay but a few sniffling sighs escaped her. His eyes searched hers desperately. His hands were just inches from hers and she could almost _feel_ him willing their fingers to intertwine.

"I want to talk about us," she breathed, on a somewhat of a high-pitched note. "I'm not sure I can live without you."

Her breath caught in her throat and her tears closed in agony, the tears she'd tried to hold back slowly slipping down her cheeks. When she opened her eyes, Chuck was still staring at her intensely, probably wondering what the hell he was supposed to do with what she told him. She wouldn't marry him, but everything else was so murky it drove him insane.

"Blair…"

Any other thoughts left him. Neither could look away.

…………………………………………………………………………………

He caught her wrist before she turned the corner and she turned to face him with a brilliant smile, long blonde hair still dangling about her waist.

"Georgina!"

"Dan," she said coolly, "Funny meeting you here." He shook his head.

"Cut the crap."

She blinked up at him innocently. "I'm sorry, Dan. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Jenny. Chuck. Blair."

"All people both you and I know. What's your point, Dan?"

He scoffed. "You're up to something."

"Aren't I always? Try to be more specific, Humphrey." Her blood was boiling but she was incredibly good at hiding it. She was good at being manipulative. She was good at finding her way out of whatever predicament put her in. Dan had become a bit of a weakness, but when she tried really hard she could avoid her feelings for a considerable length of time.

"Tell me what you did."

She scoffed. "Dan, I know I've wronged just about all of you in the past, but what makes you think I had something to do with those three?"

"Chuck took Jenny's virginity," he said, as if that explained everything.

"And this is my problem, _how_? Chuck has a natural talent for that type of thing. I only hope Snow White wasn't attached to him at the time." She smiled in a way that did unnatural things to Dan's stomach, things that made him want to chuck himself into the river with weights attached.

"That's besides the point. I know you're behind this."

She rolled her eyes, slipped the sunglasses she'd taken off back over her eyes and continued down the street.

"Wait, Georgina!" he kept up with her somewhat quickened pace. "Just tell me what you did! And where you sent Jenny?" He was frantic and she supposed she should let him in a little bit, since all her pieces had assuredly come together neatly. It wasn't as if they could really be pinned back on her. And if they could, there was no real crime. It wasn't _her_ fault the naïve blonde had fallen victim to her schemes. She stopped and spun around, taking the sunglasses back off her face and holding them in her hands.

"I sent Jenny to boarding school, just like all of you had planned. The only difference is that it's a different location." She showed him a brilliant smile that had _fake_ written all over it. "As for Chuck and Blair…" she shrugged. "They fell victim to Jenny. It's not my fault your little sister requested my help because she was _bored_."

"What are you talking about?" he asked in disbelief.

"Your sister," she said slowly, "was bored. I simply provided the means for her to get un-bored," she smirked. "It was just my luck, I suppose, that it ended up backfiring on Chuck and Blair too." She sighed contently. "Ah, revenge is sweet, is it not?"

Dan blinked, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion and some sort of almost fear. Georgina continued to smile at him, eyeing his figure in one smooth glance and then pushing her purse farther up her arm and over her shoulder.

"Good catching up, Humphrey."

The smirk did not disappear as she turned away from him completely and continued to walk down the block. Dan knew he should have asked more questions. He should have found out the full details, and most importantly where his sister had been shipped off to. A terrible chilled fear ran up his spine and he felt incredibly hot and then incredibly cool very suddenly. He ran a hand through his hair and then looked around him, trying to find something that would save him from the massacre he knew lay just beyond Georgina's words. All he could think of was the need to find someone to fix this mess. And that someone was _Blair_.

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A/N: Sorry for the shortness of that last scene, but I've had a bit of writer's block all day and I wasn't really into that scene. Heh. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please review. =)

*NOTE: I'm thinking of writing a CB fic post S3 finale about B finding out about Chuck getting shot and how things work out between them following. There's a short preview below of some of it. If you think I should write it up, please vote 'yes' on my new profile poll. =)

Nate sighed, making his way across the room. It was more like pacing, really, but he'd grown too irritated by the term that Chuck decided to let it slide. The blonde hardly went home, despite what he called him or reminded him of what he'd done. His rebuttal always won out in the end.

_"Chuck! You got shot!"_

A nurse poked her head in.

"Sir? Are you all right?" she asked, concerned. The blonde spun around, having expected the question to be directed at Chuck. But the woman was looking straight at him and he flushed a little.

"Me? I-I'm fine," he nodded assuredly. The woman seemed quite unable to believe the statement but just smiled politely and scooted out of the room.

"We could just hear you pacing is all," she said quietly. Chuck turned and looked at his best friend amusedly after the woman left.

"_Don't_," the boy interjected before his injured friend could put a word in. Chuck smiled a little, pleased with his ability to annoy the friend that had close to abandoned him in the last month. He couldn't enjoy this little entertainment for long, he reminded himself. The pain meds didn't always last for as long as he'd hoped they would. And with the lack of relief came the reminder of Blair and the memory of how he'd lost her engagement ring. Something tightened inside him and he became weary all over again.

Nate noticed as Chuck put a hand to his head, probably feeling warm and a pain coming to that unforgiving spot on his forehead. He frowned and walked to the chair just a few feet away from the hospital bed.

"Do you need some more meds?" he asked softly. Chuck chuckled, though finding himself clutching about his torso from the renewed pain.

"Can't. Not for four more hours." His eyes closed in agony. Nate looked genuinely hurt and almost as if it was himself who had nerve knives cutting into his entire body.

"Please," he pleaded. Chuck hardly had any strength in that moment, but he managed to look up to Nate and glare.

"No," he said, determined as ever.

"Chuck, I know you guys had another fall-out, but…"

"It's not another fall-out. It's the last fall-out. As in, she couldn't care if I lived or died-type fall out." His fingers pressed harder onto the painful ache in his forehead, hoping it would dull a bit.

"You know that's not true—"

"Nate," he scoffed, clutching at his chest from the natural gesture, "I told you everything. How is it that you're not siding with Blair incredibly fiercely like you were before?" He was aghast, despite the pain.

"She's not the one who got shot!" he practically yelled, but forced himself to retain some of his composure when dealing with his sickly, stubborn best friend. Chuck sighed.

"I suggest you just accept it before another nurse comes in as a result of your temper tantrums."

Nate pursed his lips, his teeth clenching inside. When he said nothing more, Chuck relaxed further into the bed and made to take his daily nap – a ritual that had started from the first day he'd shared with the hospital, over a week ago. It seemed that, although he was rescued rather quickly and the wound appeared to have healed from infection, there were…._other_ complications, and thus he had to stay. Normally, he'd insist on going back to whatever home he had and just trailing along hospital employees in his wake. But he didn't think there was much point to anything anymore. He certainly hadn't been the one to insist on Nate's presence in his room every day. Chuck Bass hardly meant a dime, except when dealing directly with money. He didn't want her to find out about what had happened. She had said she never wanted him to speak to her again. Him speaking through Nate was practically the same thing. No_._ He would not allow her to torture him with her pity, her indifference, _or_ her scarring insults.

Quite prepared to go against Chuck's orders for the hundredth time, Nate reached for his phone, and for Chuck's just to be sure. But even with his eyes closed, Chuck snatched the devices and slipped them into a secret compartment beneath his bed. Stupidly, Nate had allowed that a lock only Chuck had be available to it.

"_No_," Chuck said again, his eyes shut in a deceivingly calm manner. He waited for Nate to say something in offense but it never came, and his memories played tricks on him, tortured him all over again, just like they had done the instant he got shot – the instant he'd lost his life completely. The visions of Blair wearing that engagement ring were now completely gone. He wished he had died on those dirty streets of Prague.

_"Whatever you want to do to yourself, please don't do that to me."_

"Leave her alone, Nate," he said, momentarily rising back to the surface. "And go home."

……..

TBC?


	7. Looking Glass

A/N: You all are such faithful, wonderful reviewers. I am so terribly sorry I took almost a month to deliver this final chapter. I hope at least some of you will take pity on me and still read and review. *gulp* Thanks and enjoy. =)

…

**Ch.7—Looking Glass**

_Blair and Chuck were lost in each other on the dance floor, and Eric had wandered off to the bathroom. Serena, Nate and Dan were somewhere about, she was sure, but everybody looked to be thoroughly enjoying themselves. However, she'd seen Blair's wary glances earlier on. Georgina was going to be disposed of. She had to act quickly._

_"Georgina!" she called out to her, hastily before anyone could really take notice. The auburn vixen turned around smoothly and plastered a thick winning smile on her lips. Jenny tried her best not to look nervous. After the havoc Georgina had caused in almost keeping her father and Lily from finally getting married, uncertainty was clawing at her._

_"Jenny," she responded coolly. "What can I do for you? Lovely wedding by the way," she gestured around the room at the colorful designs and happy couples swaying to the music. Jenny nodded curtly and forced a smile._

_"Can we go…talk somewhere in private?" she asked, her face looking a little desperate. Georgina's eyebrows rose in amusement and she followed the blonde out into an adjoining room. _

_"What is it?" Georgina asked, leaning her slim figure against the doorframe of the dimly lit room. Jenny wiped her hands against her dress, demanding them not to dampen all over again and she cleared her throat, mentally commanding herself to take control of the situation._

_"What you did today is inexcusable, Georgina." The auburn color of Georgina's hair shimmered just a bit as her eyes blinked amusedly at Jenny Humphrey, especially when the blonde did not continue with her little 'lecture'. _

_"I'm guessing there's something you want from me?" she offered up with a gesture of her hand. Jenny told herself she shouldn't have been surprised by Georgina's sharp skills in putting two and two together, but it still came as somewhat of a shock. "And you don't want anyone to know about it either," she shrugged nonchalantly. Jenny's barely parted lips snapped shut._

_"I don't want to be in your debt. I just want a little more adventure in my life without being a complete bitch to everybody by becoming queen of the school."_

_"Ah," Georgina smirked. She pushed herself off the anchor of the doorframe and stared her intently in the eyes. "So, that's it, then?"_

_Jenny blinked. "I have your guarantee that this won't come back around to bite me in the ass?"_

_Georgina shrugged, unfazed. "Well, I can't guarantee anything, but if no one interferes with the generous opportunities that I can very soon be offering up in your life, I'd say the chances are pretty good that your life will become a little more…interesting."_

_She smiled while she said it, and it made Jenny nervous all over again. She clearly hadn't been thinking when she'd set out to seek Georgina's aid in the matters of her personal lifestyle. She just wanted things to be safe, normal, no stress – but she didn't want that to include boredom. She didn't think a little excitement would do harm to anyone, especially when it didn't directly affect any of them. _

_Georgina turned and went out of the room before Jenny had a chance to react. It was like the whole transaction never even happened. Within half an hour she was discreetly ushered out by some prince of some overseas country. Jenny didn't pay much heed to specifics, but warning bells dimly went off in the back of her mind._

_It was only a few months later when Chuck so conveniently was made to babysit the heir of a man of some importance to him – Damien. When her minions pointed him out, everything just formed in her mind. The wheels began to spin. Opportunity was knocking at every door until she'd fallen so down deep that she was in the source's clutches. Georgina had lied, but what else was new? The only thing that could really be pinned on her was the arrangement that had been made between Chuck and Damien's father. Breaking apart Chuck and Blair, Nate and Serena, and succumbing to drug dealing would all be pinned on Jenny. _

_She wanted a junior year to remember, and damn if she didn't get it._

The skyline of the next bright, brilliant city shone in the distance as the sun set. Jenny's eyes hazily watched the lowering of the golden sphere. It was the second train she'd been on since the day before when she'd first taken off. Georgina had very discreetly handed over both train and plane tickets for her to use as her passage overseas. Taking a plane straight from New York would have been extremely suspicious, and Lily and Rufus would have no doubt intervened immediately. Blair would have had no issues with her mysterious change of destination, but that was beside the point. Blair could care less about her now.

Jenny was still going to boarding school. Georgina wouldn't shift the plan of action so much as to give off a trace of her scent. The blonde would just be doing it extremely far from home and in the presence of maybe some not-so-nice individuals that Georgina had just gotten away from. She could not be certain, but there were clear hints from Georgina on that one that Jenny had caught. Georgina had called her smart, but she just labeled herself too perceptive and wished she were just oblivious and naïve like she'd been her freshman year.

Her phone rang beside her and lazily Jenny reached to pick it up.

"Hello?" she asked, her voice sounding a little hoarse from the lack of water she'd obtained within the last few hours.

"Jenny," the voice on the other end was demanding and she picked up the possessive, overprotective feel of it immediately. "Where are you?" He sounded downright concerned and that had hardly been his state when they last spoke. He hadn't been _glad_ to see her go, but he had _definitely_ been disappointed enough in her to keep it from showing.

"_Dan_?" she asked, confused, still recovering from the fact that he had called. He sighed, sensing her confusion and fearing for longer than expected that Georgina may have drugged her in some form before sending her off.

"Jenny, did you _take_ something?" he asked, his voice dangerously low and almost angry. It was all he could do to hide his fear and panic.

"What?" she snapped up in her seat, ignoring the looks from the other passengers. "No!" she said, knowing exactly what conclusion he'd come to – what accusation he'd nailed across her guilty slate. Dan sighed in relief. Jenny was more confused than ever.

"Where are you going, Jen?" he asked softly. She rolled her eyes and leaned her head against where her hand seemed forever implanted against the window.

"I don't know," she said truthfully, "But it can't be any worse than where I was going to go." Dan's eyebrows narrowed.

"We were sending you to mom," he said. Her facial expression didn't change.

"Yes, well…" she sighed, having no direct response. "Just let it be, Dan. I'm still going to boarding school and no doubt getting what I deserve there. So just, drop it." She went to hang up the phone but stilled herself at what she thought was Dan's shriek.

"Jenny!" he called out, desperate.

"What?" she asked, quite flustered.

"I talked with Georgina. Something's up, and I _know_ it involves you." Jenny bit her lip, wondering what all she should tell him. She didn't want anyone to suffer but it was pretty hard to avoid it now that everything was set into motion. Maybe everything was already done. All she knew was that she was the trigger and chaos would – if it hadn't already – ensue.

She told him what had happened at Rufus and Lily's wedding earlier in the year. He barely spoke throughout her whole explanation, but she knew the judgment would come soon enough. Though, it was a comforting thought that she was often the person he came to judge last.

"I'm sorry, Jen. I shouldn't have come down so hard on you," he finally said. She blinked, completely caught off guard.

"What are you _talking_ about? I deserve all of this."

He shook his head. "No, I was so furious over what you had been doing that I didn't even think about the possibility of you being manipulated into it all. I should have considered the possibility that Georgina was still holding a grudge over Chuck, Blair and Serena."

Jenny sighed uneasily, but Dan spoke up again before she could say anything further. "I'm coming to get you, Jenny. I don't know how, but I'm going to come for you and bring you home and then we'll settle everything later. I don't need Chuck and Blair's scheming to protect my little sister."

She wanted to hug him. She wanted him to be there right then, so he could hold her in his arms. Everything had exploded on her. She hadn't _thought_ when things ha happened throughout the year. She had been _grateful_. She had overcome things, and then everything just got lost in her own arrogance and conviction of being better than everybody else. Sleeping with Chuck had been the last straw – for everybody. Georgina had only really come back to town to see all the fireworks explode firsthand.

"Dan…" she whimpered.

He clutched the phone fiercely. "I'm coming," he ground out. "Where are you?"

She gasped, looking out the windows in some sign of where they were. "I don't know…" her hand raced through her full head of hair as she raked her eyes for some sign of where she was, but she couldn't find anything.

"Nevermind," he said. "Are you on the same train you left on?"

"No, I got on the second one late last night."

His breaths were low, harsh. "What does the ticket say?"

She gulped, looking down at the remainder of the ticket that had been given back to her when she'd boarded the train. "The letters are all smudged, but I think it's somewhere in 'Jersey."

He nodded, not really knowing what to do with the information. "Okay," he swallowed hard. "Just sit tight, Jen. We'll figure something out. Just," his sigh was strained, "don't get on a plane."

"I have a ticket for one," she winced as she said it. He felt like he was going to explode.

"Well, don't use it, Jen. I'll find you. Just _don't_ leave the country."

….

She could have drowned in the pools of hazel that rested on his face. From the very beginning she'd started to notice _amazing_ things about Chuck Bass. It wasn't until she fell in love with him, though, that she knew she could not live without those things. She had done some breathtakingly risky things to make sure she didn't live without them. When she finally pulled back from this love that she could not explain, everything in her screamed to fight for it again.

Chuck hadn't said another word since his first initial breath of her name. He'd been speechless and confused and frustrated. She had felt the exact same way and the few tears that had trailed down her cheeks had shown that very clearly. She didn't say a word, and for the longest time they just stared at each other. Neither would have been surprised if hours passed by in the midst of them trying to find the right words or justified actions that would save them. Chuck had already tried to win her affections again several times and had been turned down. The kiss he had swiftly forced upon her did not exactly have promising results, and so all attempts on his end stopped .The consistent rejection had been painful for him, but it was reasonable on her end and he knew he deserved it. He deserved everything she was giving him, except the possible forgiveness that he hoped might just come. It was _her_ turn now, and she had no idea what to do. The fate of their entire relationship sat on her shoulders at that very moment. She could always leave and come back later, she told herself. But it would only be harder _later_. She had to make a decision _now_. The glittering diamond she knew was safely inside its velvet box in Chuck's pocket did not make her decision-making process any easier _or_ faster.

Her phone interrupted them.

**Dan calling...**

She stifled an angry groan, barely flicked her eyes in Chuck's direction and muttered something about having to take the call.

"What is it, Humphrey?" she snapped into the phone before Dan could get a word in. Chuck's brows immediately narrowed. He was fuming.

"Look, Blair—"

"If you've come to apologize, don't bother." She couldn't believe how pissed she was sounding. Maybe she was doing it for Chuck's benefit, to get his anger to simmer down. She certainly had never been so feisty about what Dan had almost done. She had almost let him after all, and in the end he had 'shown her the light', so to speak.

He sighed. "Blair, it's not about that."

"Well, then _what_?" she nearly shrieked. She felt Chuck's eyes burning a whole into the back of her neck, and decided right then that her unexpected anger _had_ to be the result of all the stress she was under, concerning _everything_. That _included_ Chuck.

"It's Jenny. Georgina's got—"

"Well, she had it coming to her," Blair scoffed. Jenny she was actually angry at. Now she could direct her spontaneous anger in an actual legitimate direction.

"Blair!" She could have sworn she heard him stomp his foot. She blinked, amused momentarily. "Everything's screwed up! Georgina has planned all of this from the beginning. Jenny's as much a victim as the rest of us."

Blair came extremely close to hanging up on him but her hand clenched around the phone and she forced herself to stay on the line – for curiosity's sake. "What are you talking about?" she seethed. Dan took a deep breath and told her what he'd all found out.

"And you _believe_ her?" she asked him after he'd finished. Her question had been directed towards Jenny.

"She did some messed up things, but yeah, I believe her. Sleeping with Chuck was not at the top of her to-do list. It was a last resort that wasn't planned, just like everything else that happened this year."

Blair came very close to hanging up on him again.

"Don't you _dare_ try to pin this all on Chuck," she found herself saying without inflection. Chuck had stood up by this point and reeled back a little at her statement. She took no heed to his movements. "She's as much at fault with this as he is."

Dan took serious offense. "How can you _say_ that?" he asked, aghast. "This is _Chuck Bass_ we're talking about. This is what he _does_. He takes advantage of girls, and—"

"Not anymore he doesn't!" she insisted, scared of how close to screaming she was. She was breathing very hard now and Chuck walked towards her hesitantly, very concerned.

"Well, then why the hell are you two still broken up?" he fumed. Blair had no response. Her breath caught in her throat.

"Good-bye, Humphrey," she said, determined to hang up on him this time.

"Blair, wait! I need you to help me fix this!"

"Call Serena," she told him, the tone of her voice now neutral. She did not offer an explanation. Her fingers loomed too close to ending the call and she could not listen to another of his pathetic excuses or the pleading she was quickly growing sick of.

She sighed and found Chuck staring straight at her, his eyes as intense as she'd ever seen them. There was hidden hope in their depths, and that made her uneasy. She had let her thoughts burst open in her conversation with Dan. Everything had just been so overwhelming. She didn't know why she had defended Chuck so much, but everything from the whole year had just flashed before her eyes and even if it didn't justify what he'd done, it did warrant her anger in regards to Jenny Humphrey. For a moment, she felt like the lover of a murderer. She would always feel the pain over what he'd done, but she could never stop loving him and that felt like enough to save them, or at least to give them a clean slate.

She sighed shakily and ran a hand through her hair. "I can't marry you, Chuck," she said, as if it explained everything. He felt like he'd been shot with a bullet at close range and someone had dared to steal his most precious engagement ring from its safety in his pocket. He swallowed hard, hardly noticing when she walked towards him. His eyes flicked up to hers when she was within a foot of him and had taken his hands in her own.

"Not yet," she said, fearing her own words. She had given away too much of her feelings. Her heart screamed at her to take the ring and wear it right then and for the rest of her life, but common sense prevailed and told her to be careful. It also told her to run away from him and never come back. But she didn't listen. Not to that part.

She breathed shakily and leaned forward, lightly brushing her lips against his. She distinctly heard his breath catch in his throat. "I can't forgive you," she said, her eyes pouring deep into his. "Not yet," she shook her head slowly. He studied her face like he'd never seen it before, searching desperately for the silver lining.

"But I love you," she said, raising one of his hands to greet her lips. Her eyes flicked back to his and she tried her best to keep the sniffles from rising in her voice. "I never stopped, and I'm never going to."

The certainty in her voice scared him. He swallowed hard, desperately wanting to know what her words meant for them.

"I just can't forgive you yet," she whispered. Then she fell into him and instinctively he wrapped his arms around her, in shock, but pulling her close and pressing his lips to the top of her head nonetheless. She shuddered and eventually relaxed against his chest.

He had a vague realization of what this all meant, but he wasn't sure, and he knew he wouldn't be sure for awhile. Somehow though, it was enough.

"I never meant to hurt you," he said very quietly.

She nodded softly against him. "I know."

He was afraid to say it, but it slipped out without warning. "I love you."

Her eyes closed and more tears seeped out. She was silent and incredibly still for a very long time. Then her lips parted and sniffles audibly appeared in her voice.

"I know."

…

Serena's bedroom door opened and Dan looked into her impending neutral eyes. She had not been overenthusiastic about his topic of discussion but her need to be with someone had prevailed. She was having problems with Nate and he had vacated the premises for the day – had vacated _her_ for the day. Dan she could always talk to.

Stepping to the side, she let Dan enter her room.

"I don't know if I can be much help to you, Dan."

"Just promise me you'll help, or…" he paused, "try to?"

She was hesitant but nodded. "And for me?" she questioned almost playfully, turning to face him.

"Nate's an idiot," he said simply and they both laughed. The ice had been broken, and help was on the way.

…

_Serena discovered a tracker Georgina had that led straight to Jenny's whereabouts – with the help of an old fling she'd had who just happened to work in the world-wide public transportation system…and Chuck's connections with the hotel Georgina had been staying in while overseas._

_Georgina was furious but surprisingly did not react much to her dissolved plan. It had been to teach them all a lesson, but no one doubted that she'd find the opportunity soon enough. By then, they would all be ready._

_Two years later, Chuck and Blair were married…after lots of counseling and learning to trust._

_Blair forgave Jenny after a loooooong, long time._

_Nate and Serena are still working on their issues. She's not quite sure what she wants – Dan, Nate, Carter, something she hasn't found yet... She just knows that life is unpredictable. Everyone breaks, everyone falls, and when they do, they fall __**hard**__. But someone is always there to catch you when you fall, in some form or another – ALWAYS._

…_at least that's what Serena thinks. Everyone else is still wondering._

…..

A/N: THE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEND! Lol. I'm thinking it's probably not the epic ending I was going for, but I hope you still enjoyed it. I was determined not to have this story go on forever, so I thought I'd show you what happens, lol. I obviously couldn't have it all solved in this chapter without it seeming rushed. Heh. Please review. Sorry if Georgie's involvement was a bit anti-climactic, but the central of this fic was CB, so I didn't want to explode with that SL. Lol.

I'll be starting my POST S3 CB fic soon. Thanks for voting on the poll. Please vote on my poll again. It's a different one, I swear. Lol. I am curious to see which fic you'd like me to start on once I finish DaP. ;)


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